Trying To Be Human

Why I Haven't Blogged.

2011-09-22T09:22:00.005-04:00

Because L-I-F-E has gotten crazy. New full time job (which I do appreciate in this economy), 90 minute commute each way. But still...the last few months has been a whirlwind. And I don't even have kids!

Because I am having a hard time with my D management. I struggle with unexplained highs. I sit for 10-11 hours straight, and I worry what it's doing to my circulation. I slack off on wearing Dex, I am too exhausted to even exercise. The only bright spot is having access to healthy food every day at the cafeteria. I have an appointment with a brand new endo in a month, someone I've never met, because my old doctor is in Chicago. And I'm already nervous. I feel like my teenage self, scared of my mean old pediatric endo who used to yell at me for anything over 250 mg/dL.

Because there are so many other new and old DOC bloggers who speak far more eloquently than I do.

Because, admittedly, I just don't want to rehash my life these days. I'm in a rut.

Because there are times I still feel alone, no matter how many DOC connections I see. I still live my day-to-day life without ever seeing another t1PWD.

Because.

As my husband says, "Excuses are the currency of failure." So I guess I will come back when I'm done with excuses.

One Thirty A.M.

2011-05-20T01:30:00.004-04:00

One thirty in the morning
And here I am, awake
Alone again in the night
Like so many times before.

Off I search for something
To quiet the dull roar
Of neurons' thirst for sugar
To quell this nighttime low.

I sneak off to the kitchen
Careful not to wake
Sleeping cat or husband
This silent team we make

You and I, diabetes,
We mustn't make a sound
Sip slowly from the bottle
There's no one else around

Alone with diabetes
My mind is set afire
For fleeting distant seconds
Low sugar does inspire

A thousand Mona Lisas
Solutions to world peace
A million calculations
All problems seem to cease

I can't explain what happens -
To some it makes no sense -
But when the rush of a low hits me
My brain gives recompense

In form of inspiration
A poem or story line
Or maybe just a blog entry
To share with thee and thine

It's then I truly hate you
Diabetes, night time foe,
For showing me what happens
When words flow out of Low -
When Muse is made of sugar,
And fire is St. Elmo.

Crap.

2011-05-09T07:57:00.002-04:00

Not what you want to see 90 minutes after eating. (Don't worry, thanks to Dex I never went below 85.)

Mmmmmm...

2011-04-23T12:38:00.002-04:00

...finally, something that gives me back my long-lost favorite, Hawaiian Punch. And only 3g carb per savory sip!

The Dilemma

2011-04-21T13:32:00.003-04:00

The scene: A job interview for a position with great benefits and pay. I'm nailing it and beginning to think this may work out.

Suddenly, a familiar beep beckons. "Sorry, I have to excuse myself for a moment. That's my pump telling me to go get something to eat," said the interviewer.

Her assistant enters the room and immediately takes up the conversation. A few minutes later the interviewer comes back. "So, where were we...?"

The question, DOC: Do I say anything? Should I take the chance? I have been burned very badly by diabetes in the workplace before, and every piece of job hunt advice I've ever gotten screams no. In the end, I chose not to bring it up. If I get the job, I will say something. Just not yet. But inwardly, I was sooooo keen to jump...

Was I right?

Back in the Hand

2011-03-23T17:57:00.007-04:00

At the JDRF Walk in West Palm Beach, FL, March 5, 2011. The mighty wind nearly made it "Sailing to Cure Diabetes"!

I've been away for a while living L-I-F-E, but I'm still on the DOC Twitterverse and reading your blogs. Just a post to let you all know what's goin' on:

1) My latest A1C done earlier this month, 7.0, is my highest in 6 years. Blech :-(

2) I'm going to see an endo here in Florida in June for follow up. I haven't seen anyone but my Chicago PCP since 1995, so I'm nervous. Visions of an OmniPod have been dancing in my head lately....

3) Some other health concerns unrelated to the D are in hand, thankfully (and knock on wood). What a load of worry off my mind!

4) Whoever said 40 is the new 30 was lying (!)

5) And to all the people I work with now who are so totally cool with me being a person with diabetes...THANK YOU. It makes my life so much less stressful not to hide it anymore.

Cheers for now!

Delica Giveaway

2010-11-23T10:00:00.000-05:00

I volunteered at a World Diabetes Day event last weekend and received a free Delica from the kind One Touch folks. Since I'm short on words these days I thought I'd offer it up as a giveaway for the DOC. I will randomly choose a winner based on either the number of comments left on this post, or the number of cat treats my little ball of fur consumes in a day ;-) Thanks for reading and good luck!

D-Blog Day: 6 Things You Should Read

2010-11-09T10:04:00.003-05:00

In lieu of my own post today (I'm not feeling very articulate), here are six excellent blogs from fellow DOC members you should read today.

Happy reading!

November

2010-11-04T21:21:00.006-04:00

What's your diabetes month?

For me it's February. I still remember it all: the harsh-smelling soap in the hospital shower, the prick of the IV, the first shots and fingersticks. I remember watching TV with my parents, wishing I could go home to see my brother and my cat and sleep in my own bed. And wondering why everyone was so upset about me having diabetes. The fluids and insulin made me feel so much better. I was grateful to finally have relief from the siren of sleep and thirst that had literally consumed me in weeks before. Every February I am there again, feeling the rough sheets of the hospital bed, the smell of insulin fresh in my mind and my 12-year-old self close to the surface.

But it's November now and so the 'official' observance of National Diabetes Month is underway once more. For me it is a sad month on the calendar. The earth gives up the breath of life a little and goes into a deep sleep. Encroaching cold and darkness make me want to stay indoors, to cuddle up with my husband and cat or be alone for a while, pondering. It is somber in remembrance of veterans past and my late mother's birthday. The holidays seem a glittery blur far off in the distance. I am observant, chastened, repentant.

And diabetes is still there, waiting for me at every moment with tireless, destructive energy, every year. An endless string of Februarys stretches out before me. Of countless days of testing and dosing and guessing. Of wondering what I did wrong. Of kicking myself for 'bad' numbers. Of giving up, not caring, and then finding a way to get back in the groove. Of praying, and begging the higher powers for just one more chance to keep trying. Of getting up in the morning and doing it all over again, one more time. Of wondering when my time will be up. Of waiting.

Someday, maybe November won't be so bad for me. Maybe February will pass without a memory. And maybe, just maybe, diabetes won't get its own star anymore.

Book Review: Beyond Fingersticks

2010-10-13T10:23:00.005-04:00

Last year, when I was researching CGM options, I read through Wil's posts on the Life After Dx blog and several others to get an idea of what using one would be like in the 'real world' and which model to choose. Getting the Dexcom and wearing it has easily been one of the most important changes in my diabetes life, and I'm grateful for the technology even when it has a whoops! moment every now and then.

So I eagerly dove into Beyond Fingersticks, Wil's recent book about CGMS. I really liked the structure of the content--I remember reading Wil's original post and 'Art of War' analogy, and it makes perfect sense to base the book on it. One thing that really rings true for CGMS for me is "watching the flow" instead of the actual numbers. It has been priceless to know whether I'm dropping or rising, even when the values are several points off from fingersticks. I also liked Chapter 9's advice on calibration. This was totally new information to me and is already helping me get more out of the readings. Before I was feeding every value to Dex even when results were 60-70 points off.

I really appreciated the data overload discussion in Ch. 10. Seeing my blood sugar move in real time was wonderful, but trying to decipher the patterns drove me nuts for a while. It's really helpful for someone new to CGMS to realize that some of the difficulty lies in the software, and some in the way we veteran PWDs were taught to look at our numbers. Wil also covers some real-world issues in section three (chs. 11-13) that CGM makers usually leave out when they tell you about their systems. (For example, it's comforting to learn that I'm not the only one who ever ripped out a sensor in the bathroom!)

Between Wil's book, his blog posts and others (like Kerri's extremely helpful vlog on applying a new sensor!) I was ready to go on CGM without the Dexcom rep's help. Beyond Fingersticks brings the blog into your hands and is a great resource for someone thinking about getting a CGMS. For people who have been using it a while, it's still a helpful guide. Clearly written in Wil's unique sardonic style, it's an engaging read that I burned through in one sitting. It's long enough to engage in discussion, yet short and compact enough to work well as a reference book. Type 1 PWDs have more reason to gain from the content, but anyone with diabetes regardless of type will appreciate Wil's real-world explanations and wealth of information.

Order yourself a copy here!

This Post Brought to You By the Letter 'D'

2010-10-11T10:53:00.019-04:00

It just occurred to me over the weekend that some significant things in my life begin with this letter. Hmmm...

My husband's name starts with a D...

And I'm a graduate of this school...

There's the diabetes, of course...

And my little friend Dex...

There's also the double-D, Diabetes Daily...

And the other double-D, Duran Duran (which my 8th grade self would insist on calling "significant"...)

The life-giving fluid I depend on every day (besides insulin) starts with a D...

Not to mention the city I live in now...

And the city DH is working in now...

OK, this is getting weird. Notice any strange patterns in your life?!

#NoDDay 2010

2010-10-07T09:40:00.000-04:00

I have a confession to make. I am addicted to HGTV.

It was "Property Virgins" that sucked me in. What is it about peeping into stranger's houses that makes me feel so dirty, yet so excited? Why do I get such a vicarious thrill out of a 3 bed, 2 1/2 bath with a garage? At first I thought it was because our old condo didn't have in-unit laundry or a dishwasher. I railed against the idiots who dared to complain about the lack of stainless steel appliances. (What is WRONG with these people? Try not having your own at all, and collecting quarters all week so you can even DO laundry...!) And the cavernous master bedrooms and bathrooms...oh my goodness. That Sandra Rinomato is one funny chick too. She is so...Canadian :)

It got worse. I discovered "Income Property." And then "House Hunters" and "Color Splash: Miami" and "Holmes on Holmes." But there was a mean slant too. "Bang For Your Buck" infuriates me sometimes. I do wonder what people are thinking when they put $15,000 tile in a bathroom, though. And I can't make it through "Dear Genevieve" without getting nauseated. (Vern Yip was my TLC favorite--Genevieve just annoyed me.) The worst has to be "Design Star." I just can't handle the competition and fake drama.

It started with the granddaddy of them all when I was a child--"This Old House." My father had a love-hate relationship with Bob Vila (he preferred Norm Abrams). I grew up thinking it was normal to know how to install PVC piping or new roofing. Then it faded for a while, only to be stirred up by the theater group antics of "Trading Spaces" a few years back. (Did anyone else want to cut off Paige's caffeine supply?! My gosh, she was perkier than Martha Quinn!) But HGTV has taken it to a new high or low depending on your point of view. My husband and I mock house porn, yet we both like to watch. It's our dirty secret.

Have to go now, "Curb Appeal" is coming on...

(The house above is ours...it's a farmhouse in Kentucky we hope to actually live in someday)

La Florida

2010-10-04T10:15:00.014-04:00

Greetings from the Sunshine State :-) I've been off on the sidelines of the DOC for a while...my husband and I made a big decision over the summer to relocate from Chicago to Florida. We packed up all our earthly belongings and drove down the week after Labor Day. (Our cat had to stay with my dad in Chicago, but he'll be joining us in the coming weeks and our little family will be complete again.) Work was one big reason--his employer pretty much said any new work would come from the south region of their operations, and I was stuck in a vicious cycle of dysfunction at my job. The winters were getting tougher too. But first and foremost we wanted to live a healthier life with less stress somewhere new and focus on ourselves as a couple for a little while.

So now that the house is finally in livable condition (seriously, how can someone let their AC die down here?!) and most of the boxes are unpacked, I'm getting used to a new world and routines. Although my husband kept his job (he's in IT and travels for work), I quit mine and am looking for something--anything--here in south Florida. DH flies to Virginia Monday through Thursday, so I keep myself busy with what I can during the week and try to appreciate the time off. (I'm blessed to be covered by his health insurance so that's one huge worry alleviated.)

Diabetes-wise? Things have been down, and up. All the running around had me bottoming out constantly on the road and during the first couple of weeks here. But now things are a little more predictable. The biggest change for me is how I react to any kind of exertion in hot weather. I drop 50-100 points with as little as 20 minutes of exercise--either I'm more out of shape than I thought, or the climate really does a number on my absorption rates. Plus the food can be challenging. We're eating so many more "healthy" fruits and veggies now that we live near a farmer's market and prices are far less than in Chicago. But all that fruit adds up--just ask me what my BG went up to the day I ate a bowl of grapes and neglected to bolus for them (325!).

I'm hoping to blog more often now that I'm away from a workplace where surf Nazis kept watch on literally everything I did online. I've even joined Twitter--a sure sign the universe is ending ;-) And I hope to get involved with JDRF's activities in the Boca Raton/West Palm Beach area, or any other awareness work I can do. I'm still feeling a little adrift and disoriented. I've never lived outside of Chicago and all my family are there, but I was always the one who wanted to go to new places and vacationed alone when the spirit moved me. Dh and I were always driving off somewhere to explore on the weekends too. So the move is nothing new, yet for me it's almost an undiscovered country. And although my grandparents were snowbirds in the 1980s in Tampa, my memories of Old Florida are nothing like the reality in this part of the state. But it's an adventure, and I'm still more excited than anything.

Thanks for keeping up with me, and stay tuned!

Little Bear, Big Cause

2010-09-30T16:24:00.008-04:00

Wouldn't you just love to hear this in your local Walgreens: "Diabetes cure in Aisle 4" Well, we can dream, right?

'Til then, if you're in south Florida, you can help by picking up one of these little guys to benefit the Diabetes Research Institute. They're available in four different Florida state university jerseys at $4.99 apiece.

(Sorry, Seminoles fans!)

Way To Go, Charlie!

2010-09-01T23:06:00.003-04:00

What a nice surprise to see the DOC's very own Charlie Kimball on my local WGN TV news tonight. Click here to watch!

Diabetes Art Day

2010-09-01T11:32:00.008-04:00

I used to draw a lot. When I had time, I did watercolor pencil sketches of landscapes. Mind you, I have absolutely no formal training, but some of them were pretty good. So when I read about Diabetes Art Day, I sharpened my pencil set and tried to set aside some time to draw. Unfortunately, real life intervened :-(

So, in the same vein of thought as Scott, I'm posting diabetes art made one day back in 1983, when I was on day 3 or 4 of my hospitalization for type 1 diabates. I suppose it's technically a textile piece and not a painting/drawing, since the "canvas" is a hospital-issue pillowcase:

I wrote about this piece before; looking at it now, it still resonates. Most of the time, my diabetes is as invisible to others as it was here. Most of the time, I am trying to make others believe I am fine and happy, unaffected by diabetes. (And most of the time, something as simple as my cat does make me happy.) But it's what missing from the picture that really matters. I can see my years of loneliness with this disease, and the isolation I felt as the only type 1 PWD I knew. I see the teenager who spent hours reading, writing and drawing to visit worlds where the physical was unimportant. So thank you, Lee Ann, for inspiring me and others to express these thoughts today.

Araby62-ology (a.k.a. Kathy-ology)

2010-08-04T11:44:00.007-04:00

Stolen from Cara ;) Pass it on!

Let others know a little more about yourself, re-post this as your name followed by "ology".

***********FOODOLOGY***************

What is your salad dressing of choice? Lite ranch
What is your favorite sit-down restaurant? Uncle Bub's or Lao Sze Chuan
What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of? String cheese!
What are your pizza toppings of choice? I'm not really picky about pizza & don't eat it much...pepperoni, green peppers when I am.
What do you put on your toast? Butter & grape jam, or just butter sometimes

***********TECHNOLOGY***************

How many televisions are in your house? Two
How many computers? Too many--five at last count (my husband is in IT)! I think they're becoming self-aware...
What kind of cell phone do you have? HTC Touch Pro2
Do you have an iPod? No, but my husband does

***************BIOLOGY******************

Are you right-handed or left-handed? Right
Have you ever had anything removed from your body? Wisdom teeth & tonsils. (My useless pancreas is still in there, but non-functional)
What is the last heavy item you lifted? A box of photo frames & albums last night (we're moving)
Have you ever been knocked unconscious? No, but I had the wind knocked out of me once as a kid--scary!

************BULLOLOGY**************

If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die? Absolutely not
If you could change your name, what would you change it to? I wouldn't change it, but I used to like Lindsay as a girl's name. Of course, a certain celebrity has ruined that now (!)
Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000? If it was Buillard's I'd have to think about it...! Nah ;)

************DUMBOLOGY******************

How many pairs of flip flops do you own? Four (bad diabetic, I know I shouldn't wear 'em)
Last time you had a run-in with the cops? Hmm. Probably when I was involved in a train derailment four years ago.
Last person you talked to? A U-Haul representative
Last person you hugged? My husband
Last person you kissed? Ditto :)

**************FAVORITOLOGY****************

Season? Spring or fall--I like the changes
Holiday? Halloween or the 4th of July
Day of the week? Saturday
Month? May, because everything is green and there are many pleasant, warm days still ahead

***********CURRENTOLOGY*****************

Missing someone? Yes
Mood? Tired
What are you listening to? This, at my desk
Watching? Nothing, but last night I was watching HGTV while packing
Worrying about? My next round of doctor's appointments in 3 weeks

***************RANDOMOLOGY*****************

First place you went this morning? The kitchen to give the cat a treat :)
What's the last movie you saw? The Bounty Hunter. So bad, we turned it off!
Do you smile often? Lately, no. Need to work on that...
Sleeping alone tonight? Yes, DH is in Minneapolis working til tomorrow

***************OTHER-OLOGY*****************

Do you always answer your phone? Yes
If you could change your eye color what would it be? Brighter blue or green
Do you own a digital camera? Yes
Have you ever had a pet fish? Yes, when I was about 9 I won a goldfish at a carnival. But it jumped out of the bowl & died one day :(
Favorite Christmas song(s)? "White Christmas" or "Hark the Herald Angels Sing"
What's on your wish list for your birthday? I'm trying not to think about it, it's the big 4-0
Can you do push ups? A few, I'm outta shape :(
Can you do a chin up? One, maybe. Never could do many!
Does the future make you more nervous or excited? About 50/50
Do you have any saved texts? Yes
Ever been in a car wreck? Yes
Do you have an accent? Yep, I'm fourth generation Chi-cah-go-ahn (Chicagoan) ;)
What is the last song to make you cry? "Hallelujah" by the Canadian Tenors
Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom? Oh yes..
Name 3 things you bought yesterday? A Diet Coke at the train station. Didn't buy anything else yesterday
Have you ever been given roses? Yes, by my parents
Current worry? Whaddaya got? I have the Irish worrying gene
Current hate right now? I try not to hate as it is both draning & un-Christian. But since I'm human, I hate traffic, pushy people on the train and my boss.
Met someone who changed your life? Many!
How will you bring in the New Year? Probably in flip-flops on the beach in Florida
What song represents you? "Never Surrender" by Corey Hart
Name three people who might complete this? Some of my fellow D-OCers
Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? If I didn't have to stay, yes, there are some moments I'd like to relive. But not if I couldn't come back to now.
Have you ever dated someone longer than a year solid? Yes
Do you have any tattoos/piercings? No tats, pierced ears
Will you be in a relationship 4 months from now? Yes
Does anyone love you? Yes
Would you be a pirate? Nope!
What songs do you sing in the shower? 1980s crap :)
Ever had someone sing to you? Yes, in Dublin a whole room full of people sang "Molly Malone" to me as a farewell the night before I left. It was lovely :)
When did you last cry? Over the weekend
Do you like to cuddle? Yes
Have you held hands with anyone today? No
Who was the last person you took a picture of? Does my cat count?!
What kind of music did you listen to in elementary school? My parents liked Frank Sinatra and Elvis Presley. I also remember a lot of 1970s AM radio
Do you believe in staying close with your ex's? No
Are most of the friends in your life new or old? Old
Do you like pulpy orange juice? Yes, but I don't like OJ as it reminds me too much of low blood sugars
What is something your friends make fun of you for? My friends don't really make fun of me, but my best friend likes to recount stories to her kids about the wild things I used to do on my bike when I was little. My husband teases me about my 1980s music choices sometimes too :)

Dear Doctor Rob...

2010-07-26T15:33:00.004-04:00

In response to this post, here are my thoughts as a person with a chronic disease (in no particular order):

At 12 years old my life was changed forever. My parents and I joined a club with a lifetime membership and no option to cancel. I also got to see doctors as the fellow soldier in my battle rather than a demigod in a white coat. But I would rather have that seasoned veteran with a wary eye for me and my health at my side.

I have no pride when it comes to my body. Open my veins, probe my insides, shine lights in my eyes and stick pins in my feet. I will endure it all. I will willingly submit to what many healthy patients will not. I will abide, and rarely will I complain. I still remember the days before, and how very sick I was. There is little I will not do to permanently avoid feeling that way again.

I will need you to fight for me when it comes to the health care system. I am not seeing doctors to cause problems for others trying to access resources. I do my best to stay away and only come to you when I know I need your help. But the system of prescription renewals, insurance plan denials and limitations on care is a formidable enemy sometimes. Help me by coming to my aid.

I will never lie to you. Sometimes I bring you issues I know you cannot help, I can see it in your eyes when the answer fails you. It's okay, and I understand. Sometimes I just want you to know.

It's life and death for me every day, but some days I just do the best that I can. Let me have those days, and give me another chance when my numbers change. I know, and I will do better.

I have learned more about my diabetes over the last 27 years than many patients, but I still don't know it all. You know so much more about the human body than me, and what things I should or should not worry about. I trust you to be my guide. I will do my best to understand the most complicated explanations, and ask you relevant, concise questions if I do not. But I am patient with not knowing why, and will try to accept what I cannot change.

I do not expect miracles from you. In truth, I don't even expect a cure anymore. That is for others...I am reconciled to this life. It's okay, and I'm hanging in there. Thank goodness for the online community of friends who share my struggle. I just want you to be honest and straightforward with me. Please respect my intelligence and willingness to be a full partner in my care, and help me find the best tools I can to keep fighting.

A Letter from Dr. Rob

2010-07-21T10:33:00.003-04:00

Interesting...go take a look:

http://distractible.org/2010/07/14/a-letter-to-patients-with-chronic-disease/#comments

Thoughts?

Hatchling

2010-07-01T12:06:00.007-04:00

Into this life I was born
At twelve
The new normal
Fragile, like a newborn thing
Slowly I learned to crawl
Then, sometimes swiftly
To walk
To run
But still
My shell, so thin
Will crack
My delicate insides will waste
If you tip me the wrong way I will die
Yet still
Against long odds
Defiant, and straining
I struggle
A litte bit each day
Following all the others
Leaving my trail behind
To reach
The sea.

Off Topic: Virtual Vacation for the Gulf

2010-06-23T10:59:00.004-04:00

Want to help these guys? Take a "virtual vacation" around the Gulf of Mexico...check out the sights, plan a future IRL trip, and make a donation or two to a worthy cause. Click here to visit: Virtual Vacation for the Gulf. Thanks for any help you can give!

A Shot in the Arm

2010-06-21T15:09:00.005-04:00

I haven't used my arms for shots in a looooong time. Like 15+ years long. But with Dex on my belly most of the time these days, I gotta be flexible. Plus it's summer, and I'm wearing more sleeveless shirts and dresses/skirts--so Dex has to be a little more concealed than usual.

But oh, I forgot...arm sites suck when it comes to bruising:

Is it an arm? Is it a leg? (Taken from my cellphone camera at work.)

Ah, the memories...

Trop-A-Rocka...

2010-05-25T10:41:00.002-04:00

...is pretty good stuff. Way to go Bret!

Film Fest Meme

2010-04-14T10:57:00.002-04:00

Borrowed from Karen. I'm all out of D-related ideas right now :-(

Name a film that you have seen more than 10 times. Willingly? The Terminator, Aliens, The Abyss, Sense and Sensibility, It's a Wonderful Life, The Godfather (although every viewing after #4 or 5 was mandated by the men in the room!). GoodFellas (ditto), Roman Holiday, Casablanca, Raiders of the Lost Ark, Star Wars (any of the original three films), Say Anything, Spaceballs, Pride and Prejudice, and the list goes on...

Name a film that you’ve seen multiple times in the cinema. Not so much now, but back in the day we saw Jaws and any one of the original Star Wars trilogy 8-10 times over the summer.

Name an actor that would make you more inclined to see a film. Ewan McGregor; Russell Crowe; Meryl Streep; Alan Rickman; Tom Hanks; Nicole Kidman; Emma Thompson; Jennifer Connelly. And oddly, lately, Jason Bateman. (Who knew?!)

Name an actor that would make you less likely to see a film. Vin Diesel, The Rock, Steven Seagal, Ben Affleck, Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt, Jennifer Aniston (my husband's crush), and pretty much any of the low-level D-listers (Lindsey Lohan et al).

Name a film that you can and do quote from. There are many, but Top Gun, for some reason, has multiple applications in my daily life...! "Your ego is writing checks your body can't cash!"

Name a film musical that you know all of the lyrics to all of the songs. Meet Me in St. Louis. I wish I could say something more modern, but I kind of avoided musicals for a long time, then started with the oldies. But when I was 8 my best friend and I knew every last word to Xanadu!

Name a film that you would recommend everyone see. Oh gosh, that's hard. I'd rather recommend going through Roger Ebert's Great Movies and seeing more than just one. I'd also encourage you to see as many foreign films as possible--it's fascinating to glimpse lives so different than most of ours.

If it's just one, and you missed it, see Wall-E. It's beautiful, oddly poignant and fun.

Ever walked out of a film? Yes--Natural Born Killers. It was just too much.

Name a film that made you cry in the cinema. Borat--streaming tears of laughter! In all seriousness, seeing Solaris made me think of my mother and I lost it for some reason.

Popcorn? Of course! I love Sno-Caps too (in moderation, of course).

How often do you go to the cinema (as opposed to renting them or watching them at home)? We rarely go to the show anymore. It's just too expensive for most films. I'll go to see something like Avatar or a movie I really want to "experience."

What’s the last film you saw in the cinema? Avatar. Amazing effects, but the story was seriously underwhelming.

What’s your favorite/preferred genre of film? Drama, especially the old stuff. But I also love the great 1980s comedies (Planes, Trains & Automobiles, The Money Pit, Joe Vs. the Volcano, Big, etc.). I like a lot of classic sci-fi but seriously don't get the whole Star Trek thing.

What’s the first film you remember seeing in the cinema? Probably a Disney cartoon like Dumbo. But I also vividly recall seeing Star Wars when I was 6.

What film do you wish you had never seen? Trailer Park of Terror. That is 90 minutes of my life I will never get back. Lesson: never go along blindly with DH's picks at Blockbuster!

What is the scariest film you’ve seen? Believe it or not, Paranormal Activity scared the bejesus out of me not long ago. My old favorites (Psycho, The Shining, The Exorcist, Friday the 13th, A Nightmare on Elm Street) don't seem as scary now--probably because I've seen them so many times. Halloween still creeps me out though. I find I am more frightened by themes of paranormal/supernatural activity than slashers or gore.

If you could be any character portrayed in a movie, who would it be? Ellen Ripley or Sarah Connor. Elizabeth Bennett is kind of a cheat since she's a literary figure...but she rocks too :-)

Total number of films you own on DVD and video. Oh gosh...probably 20 or 30. I went on a tear buying my favorite "special collector's editions" about 10-15 years ago. Now I only buy films I cannot bear to part with.

Last film you bought. Probably Lost in Translation or Dear Frankie. It's been a while. I did, however, splurge on the Miami Vice box set a couple of years ago.

Last film you watched. This weekend--Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans. Nicolas Cage is insane.

Five films that mean a lot to you:

I Remember Mama
A Tree Grows in Brooklyn
The Best Years of Our Lives
It's a Wonderful Life
Say Anything
and many more...the first four are almost like old family friends, they always remind me of watching movies with my parents and grandparents. Say Anything is probably the one film made about my generation (X) that I'd like to see represent us 100 years from now.

OK, I guess I need to get out more ;-) What are your favorite movies, dear OC?

Interesting...

2010-03-23T10:19:00.003-04:00

This is not an endorsement, but...I just got my A1C done, and thought I'd check out one of the new at-home A1C tests, just to see how it compares to my doctor's lab:

Bayer A1C Now value: 6.1
Lab value: 6.2

Interesting. Any thoughts, folks? Has anyone used this or any other over-the-counter A1C test?

(I'm pleased with the result, BTW, it's proof the Dexcom is working. And so far, no more bum sensors to report!)

Aaaarggh

2010-03-11T12:45:00.004-05:00

Dear Dex,

We were doing so well...but why, a week before my next A1C is drawn, have you thrown me two of these in a row?

I know, I know, it's new technology and I should just be patient. The Dexcom people were really nice about it and are sending replacements with no questions asked. But was it so hard for you to work more than 11 hours? In a really good site on my upper arm, no less?

Sigh. Innovation, please speed up a little bit, OK?

Victory

2010-02-19T16:08:00.003-05:00

This is what you want to see on your email when you check on a health insurance claim:

Victory!

Thanks to ALL the OC who have helped me. Whether you realize it or not the blogs of your experiences led to this.

Lest We Forget

2010-01-27T12:29:00.006-05:00

It is still 1983.

Somewhere, in that alternate universe, space shuttles Challenger and Columbia still fly, and the World Trade Center still stands. Michael Jackson is still alive. He glides across the floor with his sparkly glove, the strains of "Beat It" in the air. TV shows like "Dallas" and "General Hospital" keep us glued to our sets every week.

In 1983 the personal computer is an amazing new device, and on a university campus or two something called the Internet is learning to walk. It is quieter, since mobile phones aren't everywhere yet. Most administrative jobs still require you to know how to take dictation.

There's a war on, but it's a simpler one, and the opponent is known. But signs of a thaw abound. At night the main source of news is the network broadcast, and if you're lucky, you have cable TV for the rest.

And, in 1983, I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes.

So much has changed in my personal care regimen. No more urine test kits, no more brick-sized meters that take minutes and divining skills to decipher. No more Lente or Regular. No more waiting 30 minutes to eat, no more rollercoaster highs and lows. A little machine beeps at my side, miraculously telling me my blood sugar in real time (or close to it). Better meters are more accurate and less forgiving. Better medicines work faster and better knowledge makes me realize I'm not alone.

But I will still need to count every carb, and I will still need to monitor my blood sugar before and after I eat or drink nearly anything. I will still need to immediately treat low blood sugar, and I will still spend hours coaxing high blood sugars down from the rafters. I will still pray the night before doctor's and eye appointments that I can keep my eyes, my feet, my kidneys. I will still need far more health care than the average person in their lifetime. I will still die without insulin injections.

For all that's changed in 27 years, it is still 1983 for me.

Paused

2009-12-27T17:33:00.001-05:00

Taking time to deal with life offline, will be back soon. All the best in 2010 to the OC :-)

Dear Ma...

2009-11-23T13:26:00.005-05:00

Today would have been your 63rd birthday. I have lost my eloquence since you've been gone, but here are some things I would have liked to say to you today...or any day.

I love you, and I am still your daughter.

P.S. You have a beautiful new granddaughter (and I a lovely niece) to add to our family happiness.

WDD 09: A Verse

2009-11-13T15:55:00.003-05:00

The Magic Act

I enjoy it sometimes,
You not knowing.
The masquerade suits me
As I dance and sing
About you,
Looking for all the world
Like a happy clown, carefree.
And yet the strings
Invisible to you
Control my every move
As a merrionette.

Numbers up, numbers down,
The push and pull of unseen hands
But my performance belies.
Yes, I enjoy sometimes
This you not knowing,
Me feigning light
And concealing dark
As though it were effortless.

I prove myself wrong sometimes,
Dancing on the end of string
I believe there is no line.
Then the music stops,
The lights grow hot,
I stand, confused, wondering why
You have stopped applauding
And staring, you accuse.

If you knew
How hard I try
To make it seem so normal,
So nonchalant,
Perhaps you would find your tender side
And sympathize.
Perhaps you'd think
Or realize
That not all who dance are happy.
But it would rob my mask of me
My ability
To prove it to myself.

And this is why
Sometimes I dance
Secretly, knowingly,
With you watching,
Admiring,
Oblivious,
Yet at my side.

Dblog Day 2009

2009-11-09T11:54:00.004-05:00

It is Dblog Day '09, and I am tired. Tired from being up all night treating stubborn lows, then the rebound high this morning that is still slowly floating down from the rafters. I am tired of Dex going off every ten minutes. Tired of pricking my fingers again and again, and taking shot after shot. Tired of looking at food like an adversary. Tired.

But I am here, and so are you, and so I am grateful. More than any of you will ever know.

Just...tired.

Bloggy Bits

2009-10-26T10:30:00.004-04:00

Hello all,

Happy Monday! Catching up on a few items with this post. First off, my sincere apologies to Elizabeth Edelman for such a delay in reviewing the Nutrisystem samples she kindly sent me! I tried them a few weeks ago.

I sampled the soup and the heat & stir macaroni and cheese with meatballs. A friend tried the two entrees.

Like others commented, Nutrisystem packs quite a few carbs in their food. Here's a shot of the macaroni label:

Yep, that's 30g carbs in one little cup. Hmmm. I heated it up and noticed the "meatballs" were really small...like cat food size!

The taste...pretty unbearable. Even with a shot of Louisiana Hot Sauce, I couldn't save it. I hate to admit it went into the garbage after a couple bites. I didn't take pictures of the soup. Basically it was the same as the noodles--bad. My friend bravely tried one entree (turkey and noodles) and told me it wasn't bad, but tasted very starchy and wasn't satisfying. So sorry to say, as much as I appreciate Elizabeth's gesture, I won't be trying Nutrisystem again anytime soon!

In other news...I got to wear one of these over the weekend:

In an effort to get back in tune, I'm actively pursuing a Dexcom Seven Plus to help improve my control One of the rules with my health insurance is that you have to be "professionally monitored" via CGMS for a 72-hour period to prove the device is medically necessary. So, after meeting with the Dexcom rep this week, I was off to the races to get the ball rolling on one of my own.

So far I LOVE the Dexcom. I cannot believe how quickly you get used to checking and reacting to the trend information. It is unfathomable that there should even be a question about whether it is "necessary". It kept me basically in range all weekend. My 7-day meter average dropped 15 points too. It even woke me up when I was low at 4AM--which is one of my big reasons for wanting a CGMS. And wow, do carbs hit my system quickly. And double wow, in the morning they're raging through me...! So the dawn phenomenon and morning insulin resistance is real after all.

The only cons I found in my short acquaintance with Dex...accuracy definitely leaves something to be desired. The rep had already started the sensor before she put it on me, and she put it in a really awkward site on my upper abdomen (where I have scar tissue from MDIs). So I think that may have had something to do with why I was 30-60 points off all weekend. Only once did Dex and my meter agree. The trends were generally correct, though. It was weird to see the line tick up or down and realize "oh, that's what that feeling is". However there was at least one instance where Dex had me crusing safely at 99 mg/dl, when I suddenly started feeling confused and irritable...and sure enough, a fingerstick rang in at 58 mg/dl. Not good. Still, I hope Dexcom has good news for me in the coming weeks. I was sad to remove the sensor tonight, and already I feel naked without the extra protection.

Oh, and finally...I changed my lancet yesterday! (;-) Thanks for the reminder, Kelly!

(Next up...all by myself, literally and figuratively...)

Target Low

2009-10-08T11:00:00.007-04:00

OK, I admit it...I love going to Target. It's one of my totally non-environmentally responsible, conspicuous consumption-laden, irresponsible-waste-of-time guilty pleasures. I love to meander around, taking my time looking at shiny things, trying on silly shoes and looking at purses and pocketbooks and the dollar items near the entrance. Oh, and buying things I actually need, like shampoo and cat food. I'm in good company here on the OC, at least (;-). But what is it with Target and lows?! Someone else (forgive me, I can't remember who) brought this up before...this happens to me every time I go there.

Case in point: last night. Entering the store, I was this number:

Which isn't bad for me after dinner. After wandering happily for a while, I suddenly felt hot and confused, trying to remember if I needed batteries or underwear. Sure enough, I dropped to this number:

I'm blaming the fact that I was in the Halloween candy aisle. Ugh!

#Nodday

2009-10-01T14:10:00.005-04:00

Thanks to George, today is a celebration of things NOT about the big D. Here are a few of mine:

I looooove space. Ever since I was a little kid, I have been fascinated by it. I so want to go to one of the last Space Shuttle launches next year...til then, I hit this site every day or so, just to dream...
..and then I click over to this site, which never fails to crack me up :-)
I also love the 1980s. I think I watched every TV show on this list. If I could I would stay home for two weeks straight and watch 'em all over again!
Being married to someone in IT just made me even more of a geek. My brother and I had a Tandy 1000 back in the day, and an Atari 2600 before that. I think this is one of the best sites for reviews. I spend way too much time on here at work, doing "research" ;-)
#4 explains why I also find myself here sometimes when the day is going slow
I'm also a news junkie...
...and a science junkie...
...and a bookworm, and I love to travel. If I do this someday, I'll be in heaven.
Speaking of travel and writing, I used to have many pen pals back in the '80s. I still keep in touch with a few, and one of them has been on some really cool trips this year.
A few years ago I volunteered for several theaters in Chicago. I did props and worked backstage. Apart from high school drama club, this was the first time I'd ever done anything on a play. I was hooked. There is nothing cooler than watching the house lights dim and hearing the story told, and imagining everything happening around you.

What are your non-D thoughts today, friends?

MeMe Monday: The Bing Edition

2009-09-28T14:52:00.003-04:00

Haven't done one of these in a while. Thanks, Karen!

Kathy needs...

Kathy needs to be on Regis. (Um, okay, but only if I don't have to sit too close to him...)
Kathy needs to do more talk shows. (Why yes, I do! Considering I've done, um, none...!)
Kathy needs your support and your vote to make NABJ 360 work for you. (Uh...ok...?)
Kathy needs the help of power lesbians Melissa Etheridge and her wife Tammy. (You can never have too much help from power lesbians, if you ask me.)
Kathy needs to travel from Plymouth. (Rock? Massachusetts? England?)
Kathy needs a new car. She'd look good in this Mini Cooper... (Why yes, I do, and yes, I would. Maybe I can drive it from Plymouth!)
Kathy needs to grow up and act her age! (What else is new?!)
Kathy needs a helping hand financially. (Oh yes. Please make your check payable to...)
Kathy needs a break. (Don't I ever...!)
Kathy needs to lose weight .(Hey, that's getting a little personal--!)

Out of Whack

2009-09-21T14:03:00.005-04:00

The six-month follow up went perfectly well, from my doctor's perspective. I presented no new health issues; I showed no new signs of complications; I haven't lost weight, but haven't gained any; and my A1C is still under the recommended 7%...at 6.9. As far as she's concerned I am the picture of compliance and should go forth confident in my numbers for the next six months.

From my perspective...I am out of whack. My A1Cs have been at or around 6 for four years now, so why the sudden increase? And I know 6.9 is not "right where you should be", at least not from the knowledge gained from all of you and every other physician I've been to in my life. My doctor is pretty concerned about the lows that come with being in the near-normal range, and I understand that. A nice gate-crashing 31 mg/dl woke me up the other night. But 6.9 is not acceptable, at least to me. Am I wrong?

For some reason this result has really hit me hard. Believe me, there were so many years when I was a teen/young adult when I didn't care...but I know now that I must try harder and do better. I have to watch what I eat and not guesstimate so many carb counts. I must stop the endless grazing at my desk and at home in the evenings. I must increase my mealtime boluses to stop the post-prandial 200s and 300s I've seen in the last month or two. I must exercise more, the 2 mile walk to & from the train station & work isn't good enough. I must try to reduce the stressors in my life. I am sooo lucky not to have complications, and I'm grateful. But I can't take my doctor's word for it this time that everything I'm doing is "good enough".

I'm also going to do one new thing to better manage my numbers: I'm going to get a CGMS. Specifically, I'm going to file paperwork for a Dexcom SevenPlus, hopefully this week. Thanks so much to the postings by Wil, Kerri, Bernard and others, I was able to really research this decision and get a true sense of what it will be like to start using a CGMS, as well as figure out which one would be most likely to help me. Not being a pumper, having a medical device on me will take some getting used to. But I have to try. I have to do something. I can't pretend that 6.9 is okay and just wait for the next A1C to tell me what I'm doing wrong.

Wish me luck!

You (Invisible Illness Week '09)

2009-09-15T15:54:00.005-04:00

You.
Always you.
The first thing I think about every day, the last thing I do every night,
Is take care of you.
Your ups and downs, your surprises, your endless list of to-dos.
It's all about
You.
There are times I can't remember
Life without you, constantly at my side, always prodding, poking,
Wanting to be noticed.
For a while I ignored you.
Then the numbers revealed my lie.
There was no escaping, it was ever and always
You.
Living with you exhausts me, wears me out.
It's "til death do us part", all right,
Except only one of us ever tries,
Ever works on it,
Ever forgives and tries to forget and moves on--
And it's never been
You.
I move among others
Half-human, half-machine,
Constantly running a program in the background
That eats up my memory,
A task manager, called
You.
Sometimes for a day I
Think I've succeeded
In quieting your endless
Demands, and at the end of the day,
I sink to my bed to escape
You.
But then you awaken me
Late in the night with
The terror of a low, the nothingness
Of sleep escapes like a shadow,
And I am left with the ravenous monster of
You.
The only thing you ever brought me
That wasn't wrapped in grief
Were those voices,
Calling out, looking out for other
Kindred spirits, brothers and sisters
Born of the same parent...
You.
Would that we never had met,
You and I,
Except for these Others
With whom I survive.

We Will Never Forget

2009-09-11T10:45:00.004-04:00

In continued loving memory of Marni Pont O'Doherty, Long Island, NY.

And Then My Heart Fell.

2009-08-31T10:53:00.004-04:00

Sometimes diabetes ignorance hits close to home...

Pregnant Relative: So I saw my doctor today because the baby wasn't kicking as much.
Me: Oh gosh! How is everything?
PR: She says it's fine, but I had to do a tolerance test and a fasting glucose because of the last time.
(Background note: PR is 39. Her father has type 2 and she was obese before getting pregnant. Her first baby was born with a BG of 34 and weighing nearly 10 lbs.--fortunately she is a happy & healthy 2 year old now. Afterwards her OB decided she 'probably had gestational diabetes, but we just didn't catch it.')
Me: Did they tell you what your results were?
PR: Yes. My fasting was 110 and the test was 154. So, she wants me to eat less carbs and try to exercise.
Me: That makes sense. Is she giving you any medications?
PR: Well, she said I might need to take insulin. So I have a question for you...
Me: (brimming with knowledge, eager to help, and happy she's reaching out to me) Sure! What is it?
PR: If I take insulin, will it make the baby get juvenile diabetes like you?

Test Strip Accuracy FAIL.

2009-08-17T12:06:00.006-04:00

You're checking your BG after consuming a Dunkin' Donuts Latte Lite for the first time. You know your morning carb-to-insulin ratio is lousy, so you're expecting a high. Which of the following is correct?:

BEEEEEP! Sorry, wrong answer. The correct one is "who knows?!?" (Ugh. I SWAG'ed 3U Humalog just in case...)

Thanks for playing!

14KPWD: 215 mg/dL @ 3PM CST 7/14/09

2009-07-14T16:01:00.003-04:00

Haven't joined in yet? Go do a test!

Bonehead: I Iz One.

2009-07-13T10:22:00.000-04:00

Tile floor: 1

Lantus vial: 0

Ugh....}:-P

Eyes Wide Shut...

2009-06-18T17:06:00.006-04:00

(Am I the only person in the world who never got that movie title?)

Anyway, greetings OC friends. Just a quick update on my eyes (see last post). I am lucky and happy to say everything is fine. My eyeball pressure readings were on the 'high' side of normal (20), but the doc wasn't concerned and said they had been there before. No other changes, no microaneurysms, didn't even need a new prescription. Yay! Thanks for the supportive comments. I felt better knowing so many of you out there feel the same way.

In other D news I took advantage of a free offer for Humalog Kwik Pens. (You can, too, if you click the link.) I still pay off-formulary prices ($80 a pop) for my prescription Humalog so this was no small matter. But I have to admit...how do any of you deal with pens?! They're driving me insane after several failed attempts using the teeny pen needles. I kept getting bubbles in the vial--even holding it at the right angle--and really don't think I ever got the correct dose. I can't believe how much packaging comes with one little pen needle, either. And I just can't help but cringe at wasting so much insulin with priming. Ugh. So yes, I'm looking a gift horse in the mouth here, but I resorted to using my old-school syringes to draw up insulin. At least it works well enough that way.

Not much else going on in my life that's blog-worthy...work continues to be stressful and difficult, but a large project just ended on a positive note so I can breathe a bit now. Just waiting patiently for summer to arrive like many of you so we can spend more time outdoors!

Nervous Much?

2009-06-12T13:39:00.002-04:00

Tomorrow. Tomorrow at this time I will know if there's a breach in the perimeter. If the enemy has advanced.

The dreaded annual retinal exam. It's tomorrow.

You might wonder why I'd worry, someone with apparently good numbers who's never had a speck of trouble. You might even consider my anxiety a little self-indulgent.

But I still do. I worry about the 'what-if' part. Every. single. time.

Tomorrow at this time, I will be grateful, I hope. And able to breathe easy for another year.

I hope.

One Of Us.

2009-05-27T16:48:00.004-04:00

For every silly Diabetes Police comment we've had to endure over the years...

For every shot we've had to take in a public restroom, or every stare we've gotten for our pumps...

For every late-night low (or high) we've had that intrudes on the following day...

For every rude remark from a co-worker, classmate, supervisor, family member or friend...

For every time we've had to suffer the damning praise of low expectations...

For every class, every job, every opportunity that we had to let pass us by...

For what it's worth, and regardless of your political standpoint...

Yes. We. Can.

At Least I Have a Job

2009-05-11T13:00:00.002-04:00

Coming up for air here, it's mid-May already and I'm busier than a one-legged man in an a**-kicking contest. Or is it mine that's getting kicked?!? Here's a typical day...

4:30AM: Wake up with 13 lbs. of feline on my head. Push cat to foot of bed. Repeat as necessary for the next two hours.

6:30AM: Wake up, help husband get out the door to catch an early train. Try to sleep for 'just a few more minutes.' Cat decides to snuggle on my chest. Nice.

7:15AM: Awake from doze with alarm ringing and cat yowling. Get ready for work. BG in range for once--83 mg/dL. I do nothing, as the dreaded Dawn Phenomenon usually kicks in about now.

8:00AM: Enjoy a few moments of quiet on the train. (My new Sony Reader is wonderful too...)

8:30AM: Walk one mile from train station to work. Pick up healthy lunch items at grocery store on the way. Our office's tiny fridge barely fits a wedge of cheese between eight staff members; there's also no soda machine in our building, so I tote my own Diet Coke too. Lunch choices nearby include Subway...and that's it :(

8:50AM: Arrive at desk. Tense up when I realize The Tool* is already in. Log on, try to read some D-blogs before the onslaught begins.

(*Annoying person #1. I work with three of 'em! )

9:00AM: Reply to e-mails from colleague who works at home**, hope she's in a good mood and doesn't take offense to anything I've written today. Start troubleshooting some computer issues (I'm the unofficial IT staff). Spend the next 90 or so minutes trying to understand and fix an Adobe installation problem. Field phone calls, reply to four more e-mails from Remote Colleague and a 10-minute long IM exchange. Dawn phenomenon and stress make for some 200+ BGs. Ugh.

(**Annoying person #2. )

10:30AM: Phone meeting. Looong, boring. I hate typing minutes, but at least I get to write...

12:30PM: Scarf down cheap lunch at desk. Take my daily Lantus shot. I almost look forward to the quiet few moments I spend doing this.

1:00PM: Called away to fix another computer. The Tool, who fancies himself an IT "expert", has installed something that caused his computer to crash. Spend 15 minutes trying to get him to admit what it was, then another 15 to tell him to uninstall the program. Give up when I realize he's ignoring me.

2:00PM: Answering more emails, walking carefully so as to avoid mines. Post-lunch BG is acceptable for work (139 mg/dL). I'm wary of over-correcting.

2:30PM: Staff meeting. Oh joy. Spend 20 minutes listening to The Consultant*** talk about how she thinks we should be (a) filing, (b) naming our files, (c) thinking about what to name our files before we name them, and (d) describe in great detail the naming conventions at her previous place of employment. Thank God for Diet Coke.

(***Annoying person #3. )

4:00PM: Drag myself out of conference room. Test, expecting a midafternoon drop. Sure enough, 73 mg/dL. Have a snack so I won't go low while walking to the train station.

4:30PM: Wrestle myself out of a late task thrown at me by the Consultant. She is oblivious to the hour, thinks I have no problem working past 5. I gently correct her while secretly planning my escape.

4:50PM: Run from the building as if on fire. All thoughts of work stress evaporate when I see my DH waiting on the platform. We ride home and plan our evening, which devolves into vegging out in front of the TV.

9:30PM: Exhausted, but happy together again, we close up shop for the night. The cat approves. Pre-bed BG of 191 is high, but I'm too tired to care. After some more TV we're off to the land of Nod.

Thank goodness Memorial Day weekend is coming up soon. I need a break!

Hope you all in the OC are hanging in there (:-)

The Mom Bag, and My New Little Friend.

2009-04-03T13:25:00.007-04:00

The strap finally gave way so my winter purse has gone to the recycle heap. Here's my new one, a.k.a. the 'mom bag'. Can you spot the PWD by what's inside?

Like many of you, I've struggled for years to find the perfect stylish purse with enough room for all my D- and non-D crappe...oh well. At least I'm OK with this year's quasi-classic equestrian look (I hope).

My favorite watch also happened to die recently, so I splurged on a new one...does that logo look familiar?

On the back it says "Type 1 diabetes, insulin dependent" along with my ID number and Medic Alert's number. My old one was worn out, and so outdated it still had a local number and not Medic Alert's 800 number. Hopefully it's never needed, just like the old one. But I also hope the EMTs and doctors of the world notice it's a Medic Alert symbol, not just a watch. Any thoughts from you all? I plan to take an informal poll the next time I'm in my MD's office...

Happy Friday, everyone!

Diabetes is Not a Morning Person

2009-04-02T10:47:00.000-04:00

6:19AM: 118 mg/dl. I want to take a picture of my meter, I'm so happy.

9:19AM: 298 mg/dl. I've had one Diet Coke and walked a mile from the train to work. WTF?! Did I wake D up too early again today?

This dawn phenomenon thing really gets me down...ugh :-(

1, 2, 3, 4

2009-03-28T13:52:00.004-04:00

Here's a meme from a non-DOC friend. Pass it along!

A. Four places that I go to over and over:
1) Home
2) Work (ugh)
3) Walgreens!
4) Micro Center (my husband is in IT)

B. Four people who e-mail me (regularly):
1) My husband
2) My best friend Alanna
3) My sister-in-law
4) Acai Juice Wonder Weight-Loss Drink Pitchman!

C. Four favorite smells:
1) My husband's hair
2) Rain in the summertime
3) Freshly popped popcorn
4) Old books

D. Four places I would rather be right now:
1) Florida with my husband
2) Cashing in a multimillion-dollar lottery ticket!
3) Walking down a street in London
4) Driving out West

E. Four favorite TV shows:
1) The Office (American version)
2) NCIS
3) CSI: Miami
4) The First 48

How True

2009-03-27T11:22:00.004-04:00

I'm checking out the new dLife Diabetes Timeline and came across a wonderful quote:

"Our characters are strengthened by a perpetual self-control; we have come to detest the pasty and the saccharine in thought, word and deed. We shall be plain and fine with each other. Formerly diabetics died, but now I shall begin to look for the diabetic influence in every aspect of life, in art, science, conduct, a new delicate strength, a restraint and a clearness."

--H.G. Wells, 1934

Amazing to think he got it, even then. Somehow I think this is what the Diabetes OC has become too. I wonder what Wells would have thought of all of us being 'plain and fine with each other'?

What inspiring words lift you up when diabetes gets you down?

The Crazy Train: I Iz On It

2009-03-19T16:31:00.008-04:00

Work has eaten me alive. I am consumed with a huge project, a difficult co-worker (who happens to be a friend of the boss IRL...ugh), and wouldn't you know it: a day of 250+ blood sugar levels. I'm beginning to wonder if my insulin has taken the day off.

At home my cat has gone mad with spring fever. He yowls at the bedroom ceiling every morning at 5:30AM, completely oblivious to the human heads underneath his paws. My husband is sick with the plague (oops, flu) and his old hip injury has flared up again. And our work commute has had us coming home late every. single. day. this week.

But hey--tomorrow is SPRING!

I just hope the crazy train goes back to the station soon.

(Almost) Like a Normal Person

2009-03-13T16:00:00.000-04:00

The test results are in: my latest A1C is 5.9. My doctor was pleased."You're walking around like a normal person," she said.

Sure, I thought, if you consider it normal to shove sharp objects into your fingers and stomach several times a day. Or spiking into the WTF-300s for no apparent reason. Or see the worry and frustration on your husband's face when you say those magic words: "I'm low."

But it's a good thing to be back in the 5% club, I guess. One more small victory scored against fate. Next up: the annual eye exam in May. Woo-hoo!

Back in the World

2009-03-02T16:32:00.005-05:00

Greetings all :-) Finally have time to post an update here. I'm enjoying a rare day at work without someone tracking my every Internet move ):-P

I'm happy to follow up on one of my earlier posts with good news: I had three wisdom teeth extracted about 2 weeks ago, and so far everything is healing nicely. Thanks to everyone who passed along their tips--it was far less intimidating with your knowledge on hand. I went with local anesthesia only, which worked much better for me, I think. The procedure only took an hour and I was better able to take care of myself afterward. I purposely cut back a unit of Lantus for the 72 hours immediately before & after, which helped manage the lows, but I had a couple of what-the-**** numbers in the 400s in the morning the days following surgery. Not sure if it was the stress, the antibiotic, or the Frappucinos I tried to drink to get my caffeine fix--probably all of the above (:-(. (Next time I'll remember to have some flat Diet Coke on hand!)

The dentist prescribed me Darvocet for pain which I ended up not taking...I didn't want to go low and not be able to treat myself. I managed pretty well on big doses of Motrin instead. (Interestingly, the dentist also wanted me to take prednisone for swelling but I refused, knowing what steroids do to BGs. Ice and heat kept it from being too awful.) The big take-away? Kids, get those wisdom teeth out while you're young! :-) I sure wish I had.

In unfortunate news, another ocular migraine hit me last week, the first one in about a year. Nasty buggers :-( They always freak me out, and I never know what to do except cringe in bed waiting for them to pass. This time I actually got a headache afterward, though not as bad as some I've had. Ugh.

Next up on the radar is my A1C, which I'll have done next Monday. Hope it'll be the same or lower than it was in November. After that I would very much like to forget about anything health-related for a while and just take a vacation. Of course, the D never takes a break, but you know what I mean :-)

Stay warm and see you on the flip side!

Laissez Les Bon Temps Roulez!

2009-02-24T15:56:00.001-05:00

...but not too hard! Happy Mardi Gras :)

26.

2009-02-18T13:06:00.003-05:00

My poor blog has been badly neglected--unfortunately the workplace surf Nazis are to blame. Nothing remarkable or unusual--or blog-worthy--has really happened, so you're not missing much. Just the usual ins and outs of the daily routine...the morning highs have evened out a bit. I'm due for another A1C on March 9th, which I hope will be at or below my last one in November (6.1). Keep your fingers crossed for me!

Oh, and this month marks my 26th year of living with type 1 diabetes. So far so good...

Hurry spring!

Please Help

2009-02-11T17:36:00.006-05:00

Mark Pardew / Associated Press

As many of you know, parts of rural Australia were devastated by bush fires this past weekend. Besides the 200 people known to have died so far, countless thousands of wild animals have perished. The suffering is ongoing.

What's the connection to diabetes, you ask? Well, it turns out Australia has one of the highest rates of type 1 diabetes in the world. And one of our fellow OC'ers is from Brisbane. But this post is really just my simple, personal appeal for those who can afford to be a bit generous. Australia has a special place in my heart for so many reasons, and Oz is hurting right now. Please help.

The following reputable organizations are taking online donations via credit card (Visa or Mastercard). Don't forget--your U.S. dollar goes a bit farther Down Under right now. For example, a $50.00US donation nets an Australian charity $76.00AUS. Thanks in advance for your support.

The Tribe Has Spoken

2009-01-12T16:48:00.002-05:00

Greetings friends!

I've been mired in work and other offline matters since the holidays, but I've been lurking and commenting when I can. Like many of you I also saw "Intervention" recently and read what others had to say, particularly Lee Ann. After watching the show I felt an overwhelming urge to reach out to John C, the subject of the show. I thought he would benefit from knowing we're out here. So I sent a letter with a list of blogs, including Diabetes Daily, the Diabetes OC and dLife, as well as some of your websites. I wanted to share with you all the response I got today:

"Kathy,

Thank you so much for the letter you sent our production company, GRB Entertainment, regarding online diabetes resources. We will be sending the information along to John, the diabetic we profiled on “Intervention.” Thanks so much for your kindness to John.

Best, Jen"

So, John, if you happen to click over, I join the rest of the online community in greeting you. Welcome to the tribe!

Friday Night Videos: Christmas Past

2008-12-19T13:05:00.000-05:00

For those of us in the Chicago area, no Christmas would be complete without the local kids' show airing these little clips. Enjoy and Happy Holidays!

Hardrock, Coco, and Joe

Suzy Snowflake

Heart-y Matters

2008-12-18T13:45:00.008-05:00

After fighting an uphill battle for nearly 14 years, my primary care doctor and I have given up. We've been trying unsuccessfully to increase my low HDL number. She called in the reinforcements after my September reading yielded an all-time low of 23. (Normal for women is 40 and above.) I'm on a statin now and have been on several different medications in the past...all to no avail. So yesterday I went to a cardiologist for the first time, to see what else can be done. We in the OC are a special tribe when it comes to the ol' ticker, of course. But my mom died of a heart attack at age 55, so I'm in the real 'red flag' category.

The good news? My heart is healthy and happy, despite the HDL issue, and my blood pressure is in normal range. (My LDL and other numbers have always been fine.) To my surprise, though, the doctor patted me on the shoulder and complimented me on being in such good control of my diabetes. I felt weirdly proud and oddly emotional. Sometimes you just need to hear that, I guess, especially from the medical profession. The only thing he suggested I consider in the near term is more exercise (of course) and losing what weight I can (of course, although I'm not too far off). I will also have a more sensitive cholesterol test done soon to see if my statin should be switched.

The eh? news...the ACE inhibitor issue came up. Again. I have never had proteinuria, touch wood, but twice in the last year my PCP has mentioned starting me on one. Apparently it protects the kidneys of PWDs so they'd rather we start sooner than later. Hmmm. We'll see, the cardio doc backed off a little and said he'd be willing to wait on that one.

While waiting, I was thinking about Lee Ann's recent post. The heart is the center of the body, of course, but isn't it (not) funny how it becomes the center of a PWD's thoughts? When I was a kid I simply never worried about my heart. I'd been a fit, healthy, active child, more tomboy than girly-girl. As a teen, and for several years after diagnosis, I rode my trusty 10-speed everywhere, never thinking about the great workout I was getting...it was simply my way to explore and get around. But then the stress began with adulthood...and I noticed every twinge and pain in my chest, and even had an EKG or two. But always as a precaution. No one ever mentioned autonomic neuropathy, although it must have been something in the back of their minds. (For years when I lived alone, Mom expected a call from me first thing every morning--did she know about 'dead in bed' syndrome, or was it just normal parent-of-a-type-1 worry?)

When my mom passed away, doctors were quick to point out all her risk factors to me and stress how different I was from her. They reassured me I would likely not share her fate. But do they worry? The cardiologist said yes, of course, and that's why you're on a statin with aggressive management. That's why my doctor was so quick to refer me to a specialist.

Do I worry?

Long ago I started to try turning negatives into positive energy in my life. So, instead of worrying about what could happen, I decided to enjoy every moment. To express love instead of waiting for "some other time". And, hardest of all, to try forgiveness and patience when I might be quick to anger. It all sounds like greeting card schmaltz, I know, but if you really try it works. It's the constant trial that wears on you.

So I will, as always, do as the doctor says. (He noted that diabetics are his most compliant patients.) Hopefully my HDL number will improve. And hopefully, I will defy the odds.

Some Days...

2008-12-10T12:36:00.014-05:00

Some days I feel so old. My husband and I moved over the weekend, and even though we hired movers we're both still torn down by the effort. The whole experience was draining, even though we love our new home. Mentally and physically, we're just exhausted.

And, some days, I just want to stage a diabetes sit-in. A break from it all. A day without worry. The testing, the constant flow of numbers, the shots, the checkups, the routine...it wears on you. But you do it. After all, what choice is there?

Some days, this is my theme song. It wasn't written about diabetes, but when I'm having one of those days, this is playing in my head. Today is one of them. So here's to all those out in the OC doing our best to hang in there--and to better days ahead.

Does it ever end, tell me?

Does it ever change color?

Does it ever start feeling better while the rains keep reminding me

Does it ever heal, show me

Will it ever rise higher than all the secret pain hurting everything

I only want to know love

Break the chain

Can I draw the moon sleeping

Can I paint the sky speaking

All the slient words louder, louder still, free the universe

Break the chain

I only want to know love

When I lose my way, find me

When I am afraid, soothe me

When I cut I bleed, touch me

Truth is everything I believe in

Break the chain

I can run wild raise my arms reaching for the open sky

I belong here where the light is strong

I will lay my body down, imagine all the flowers again

Corey Hart, 1998

Food Meme-a-thon

2008-12-01T17:00:00.000-05:00

Since my brain is in Monday mode, here's my contribution to the latest OC meme. Enjoy! :-)

1. Can you cook? If yes, do you like to cook?

Yes, and yes. Especially with my husband.

2. When do you eat with your whole family?

My 'whole family' 98% of the time is DH, and we always eat dinner together. I grew up with the family around the dinner table every night, believe it or not, never knowing how rare that is (!).

3. What do you eat for breakfast?

I try to have a breakfast bar at my desk during the week. On the weekends, I generally have a little cheese or half a muffin. My insulin-to-carb ratio is awful in the AM so it's very tricky. Sometimes I don't eat until lunch. (I have trouble with dawn phenomenon from time to time...)

4. When, where and how do you eat on weekdays?

In the AM, it's a breakfast bar at my desk and I usually stay in for lunch. I try to eat yogurt and fruit no matter what; the main course is usually pasta & chicken or a sandwich. Sometimes I drop in the afternoon, so I'll have another breakfast bar around 3-4PM before driving home. In the evening we've fallen into a bad habit of eating out for dinner (see #5). I'll make popcorn or eat a cookie/cheese stick at night before bed, to avoid nighttime lows. Generally I try to consume the majority of my calories at lunchtime.

5. How often do you eat out (in a restaurant)?

Too often...almost every night! DH is low-carbing, though, so we choose more healthy foods than not (lots of salads).

6. How often do you order delivery/take-out?

Rarely--last time was pizza for a party over a year ago.

7. Regarding no. 5 and 6: Say there weren’t financial reasons would you do this more often?

Actually, for us it's the time & not the money. By the time we're both home from work it's so late, we're too tired & hungry to start cooking a meal. When I worked part-time, I would cook dinner for us most nights of the week.

8. Are there any “standard dishes” you serve regularly?

We tend to try lots of ethnic dishes, and keep going back to some favorites (like chicken curry & fish in chili bean sauce). Otherwise, we're fond of your typical meat & vegetable combo.

9. Have you ever cooked for more than 6 persons?

No...eek! DH has, but it was on the grill so I deduct points for difficulty ;-)

10. Do you cook every day?

No, though in the past I did.

11. Have you ever tried recipes from blogs?

Yes, on & off the DOC. We really like Kerri's seriously zippy white bean salad!

12. Who cooks more frequently at your home?

DH.

13. And who cooks better?

DH, hands down. But I'm neater :-)

14. Do you cook totally different compared to your mother/parents?

Yes, and no. I've inherited my mom's methods but like to try new ingredients/spices she'd have never touched. The best of both worlds, I guess ;-)

15. If yes, do you nevertheless eat at your parents?

Yes, but ever since my mom died it's been totally different, of course. My dad can boil soup and make a sandwich, and that's about it.

16. Are you a vegetarian or could you imagine being one?

No, and God no :-)

17. What would you like to cook which you haven’t dared to make yet?

It would be really nice to make an entire meal for all my family. We don't have a lot of space so it's difficult to manage.

18. Do you prefer cooking or baking?

Equally fun, though I can eat less of the latter.

19. What is your greatest misery in the kitchen?

Not enough room...and no dishwasher!

20. What do you dislike?

I can't really handle weird, rubbery textured things (i.e. calamari, squid, etc.). Licorice flavor is also bleh. Other than that I'm not too picky :-)

What She Would Have Been...

2008-11-24T14:35:00.008-05:00

She would have retired.

Much to her chagrin, she would have started getting 'senior discounts' at the stores and online.

She would perhaps finally have taken that long-overdue second honeymoon with Dad.

She would have taken up a second career, like the answering service she always dreamed of running or the McDonald's franchise she wanted to buy.

She would have celebrated her children's weddings, and enjoyed the company of a new daughter- and son-in-law.

She would have welcomed her granddaughter with unequaled joy, and doted over her.

She would have helped out at holiday meals and been a part of every extended family gathering.

She would have been a proud great aunt to three more little cousins.

She would have been relieved that my diabetes is in such good control.

She would have worried, like always, every time I was RPS, and clucked over me until I felt better.

She would continue to be my main support for all things, diabetes and otherwise.

She would have been glad that I finally found someone to love and take care of me.

She would have been loved, and cherished, like always.

She would have been 62 yesterday.

Happy Birthday, Ma. I love you (:-)

The Tooth, and Nothing But the Tooth...

2008-11-17T10:32:00.003-05:00

Dear friends of the OC, I have a question...I'm considering surgery to have my wisdom teeth removed (at the ripe old age of mid-30-something!) and I'm curious. Have you had it done, and how did it go? For those on MDI, what did you do to deal with your BG levels? Did you take painkillers/steroids? How did they affect you?

I'm leaning toward a plan involving local anesthesia, doing one side of my mouth at a time. (I haven't had surgery since having my tonsils out at age 4, so the thought of going under is a little nerve-wracking.) I have two 'supernumerary' teeth in my upper jaw that will need a little more pushing & pulling than anticipated. Also, one of the lower teeth is hitting on the big nerve down there that apparently provides feeling to one's entire jaw (yikes!). Anyone go through a simliar experience, and if so how did it work out? Has anyone gone under or had partial gas?

Any & all comments are most welcome, thanks!

Be Aware

2008-11-14T11:00:00.010-05:00

Be aware. Diabetes isn't always what you think it is.

It can be visible. A finger stick in the lunch room, a pump in the board room. A pat-down at the airport. A needle and a vial in a bathroom.

It can be invisible. A hidden disability, yet disabling all the same. Robbing sleep, vitality, ambition, vigor. Worse, stealing sight, toes, limbs, life.

It can be controlled as well as can be expected by the clumsy efforts of human hands. But really: have you pondered how your kidneys filtered waste from your blood today? Can you think of the last time you worried how ATP got into your cells? Or how oxygen entered your bloodstream from your lungs? Does any basic metabolic function occupy your every waking thought?

There is no cure for diabetes. All the insulin in the world cannot banish it from your body. Be aware.

D-Blogger Day

2008-11-09T11:05:00.003-05:00

This is my first D-Blogger Day post. I joined the Diabetes OC in January 2008, after Googling 'type 1 diabetes blogs' and finding Six Until Me, Diabetes Mine and Tu Diabetes. As my first year of blogging comes to a close I think of how different the world is for me now. How many new friends I've met, how many helpful diabetes management tips I've learned, how many common problems we all share. But mostly, I think about the long years I've spent alone with this disease, never really knowing any other diabetics. I always felt like an alien trying to be human, a machine. It is overwhelming, uplifting, amazing, wonderful and beautiful, and so much more, knowing that there is such a special community online.

So thank you all for putting virtual pen to paper and writing about your lives. It makes me feel like someone truly, finally understands. In this month of giving thanks, I am grateful for all of you.

Friday Night Videos

2008-11-07T10:58:00.003-05:00

Just got the results of my latest A1C back -- 6.1, same as in July. So all my stressing on it was for naught, I guess. I'd like to be back in the 5% club someday, but I'll take what I can get :)

In honor of my personal 'status quo', here's a little Status Quo from the ultimate '80s musical extravaganza...Live Aid :) Enjoy!

Change.

2008-11-04T14:50:00.001-05:00

Victory.

2008-11-03T11:00:00.004-05:00

Dear Mrs. _______,

Thank you for your letter regarding your visit to Six Flags Great America. I apologize for the delay in responding. However, careful review and consideration is given to each letter as we continually strive to improve our operations and service.

I appreciate it when our Guests take the time to contact me with their suggestions and concerns. I am always interested in our Guests’ experiences as they help us to continually improve our operations and service. On behalf of Six Flags, let me apologize for the inconveniences you experienced throughout your day.

Our Six Flags History began in 1961 with the opening of Six Flags Over Texas. At that time we established several principles which are still part of our day-to-day operation. One of these principles is a “Guest First” response towards all of our Guests. Each of our Team Members is highly trained to implement this “Guest First” response at all times, I am sorry that the Team Members you encountered during your visit did not portray this high standard that we set for ourselves.

In 2008 we implemented a loose article program to help increase the speed of our lines at the six rides utilizing the program and also to help reduce the number of articles lost on each of these rides. We do allow fanny packs which may be fastened around your waist, as long as they do not interfere with the operation of the restraint. Guests who have special medical needs associated with their bags are encouraged to visit Guest Services on the day of their visit to receive a Medical Sticker to put on their bag, allowing them to bring their bag through the ride queue line.

Guest satisfaction is very important to us at Six Flags Great America. We survey our Guests daily and have found that the vast majority of our Guests rate their overall experience at Six Flags as excellent or very good. As in all service industries, we do find that service breakdowns do occur. Please allow me to apologize on behalf of Six Flags for the inconvenience you have experienced.

I am sorry to hear about your last visit. I would like you to return to our Park as my Guests. Enclosed, please find a Complimentary Ticket Reservation, valid for four (4) complimentary admissions, which may be redeemed on any regularly scheduled operating day during the 2009 Seasons. On the day of your visit, present either your Complimentary Ticket Reservation or photo identification at Guest Relations to receive this offer.

I appreciate your family’s patronage and hope you will consider a return visit to Six Flags Great America.

Sincerely,
Chris Morris, Guest Services, Six Flags Great America

Friday Night Videos: Halloween Edition

2008-10-31T13:31:00.004-04:00

This came out too late for Halloween, 1983 but it's too much fun not to share. Happy Halloween, everyone!

(P.S. Coming Monday...sweet victory)

One Word Meme

2008-10-30T11:30:00.002-04:00

It's the new sensation that's sweeping the nation! (Or at least the OC). Repost as desired:

1. Where is your cell phone? Charging.
2. Your significant other? Magnificent :)
3. Your Hair? Blonde.
4. Your Skin? Pale.
5. Your mother? Heaven...
6. Your favorite thing? Walking.
7. Your dream last night? Work (yikes!)
8. Your favorite drink? DietCoke (making it one word, dammit--it's mine)
9. Your dream/goal? Simplicity.
10. The room you’re in? Den.
11. Your ex? Forgotten.
12. Your fear? Yellowjackets.
13.Where do you want to be in 6 years? Kentucky.
14.Where were you last night? Home.
15.What you’re not? Snarky (!).
16.Muffins? Chocolate :)
17.One of your wish list items? Dishwasher.
18.Where you grew up? Chicago.
19.The last thing you did? Napped.
20.What are you wearing? Sweats.
21.Your TV? Olevia.
22.Your pets? Kitty.
23. Your computer? Dell.
24. Your life? Busy.
25. Your mood? Wiped.
26. Missing someone? Yes.
27. Your car? Chevy.
28. Something you’re not wearing? Makeup.
29. Favorite Store? Target.
30. Your summer? Crazy!
31. Like someone? Deeply...
32. Your favorite color? Sapphire.
33. When is the last time you laughed? Tonight.
34. Last time you cried? Friday.
35. Who will respond to this? You!
36. Whose answers are you anxious to see? Amylia :)

Stressing

2008-10-28T10:48:00.004-04:00

I'm due for my next A1C in a week, and I'm stressing. Life has been hectic lately for me, just like all of you, and although I've been pretty good about my routine I feel tense. The questions fill my head every day & night...why do I feel like a few post-meal spikes make me "bad"? Or that a stubborn dawn phenomenon is somehow my fault? Why is it that even a small food reward makes me feel so guilty? I feel like that newly diagnosed teenager all over again, even if my numbers aren't really cause for grave concern. I have this nagging feeling my A1C will be up...and a growing sense of frustration about it. About why a number, especially one that's only partially in my control, has so much power over me. It makes me wonder if the D is all I am sometimes.

I haven't been able to spend time on this blog for lots of reasons lately, one of which is this lack of ability to articulate my unease. It just feels...ugh. You know? This isn't a good mindset going into the holidays, I know. Maybe it's the plague/RPS I've been fighting this week, but I just wish I felt more positive these days. Hopefully this, too, shall pass.

Friday Night Videos

2008-10-24T12:00:00.001-04:00

Hard to believe this song came out 25 years ago this month...yikes!

This version is a treat for you die-hard DD fans. My friends and I used to do this all the time with DD videos :) LOL!

Have You Ever...?

2008-10-22T11:35:00.007-04:00

Stolen from Kate :)

So...here’s the game: There are only two rules -- and you MUST follow them!

1. You can only say Yes or No.
2. You aren’t allowed to explain anything unless someone asks you, so feel free to ask.

Have you ever...

1. Taken a picture fully naked? — NO

2. Painted your room? — YES

3. Made out with a member of the same sex? — NO

4. Driven a car? — YES

5. Danced in front of your mirror? — YES

6. Have a crush? — YES

7. Been dumped? — YES

8. Stolen someone’s heart? — YES

9. Gotten in a car with people you just met? — NO

10. Been in a fist fight? — YES

11. Snuck out of your house? — YES

12. Had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back? — YES

13. Been arrested? — NO

14. Made out with a stranger? — NO

15. Left your house without telling your parents? — YES

16. Had a crush on your neighbour? — NO

17. Ditched school to do something more fun? — NO

18. Slept in a bed with a member of the opposite sex? — YES

19. Seen someone die? — YES

20. Been on a plane? — YES

21. Kissed a picture? — YES

22. Slept in until 3? — YES

23. Love someone or miss someone right now? — YES

24. Laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by? — YES

25. Made a snow angel? — YES

26. Played dress up? — YES

27. Cheated while playing a game? — YES

28. Been lonely? — YES

29. Fallen asleep at work/school? — YES

30. Yelled at a friend? — YES

31. Felt an earthquake? — NO

32. Touched a snake? — YES

33. Ran a red light? — YES

34. Been suspended from school? — NO

35. Had detention? — YES

36. Been in a car accident? — YES

37. Hated the way you look? — YES

38. Witnessed a crime? — YES

39. Pole danced? — NO

40. Been lost? — YES

41. Been to the opposite side of the country? — YES

42. Felt like dying? — NO

43. Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t? — YES

44. Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? — NO

45. Caught a snowflake on your tongue? — YES

45. Sang in the shower? — YES

46. Made out in a park? — YES

47. Had a dream that you married someone? — YES

48. Glued your hand to something? — YES

49. Got your tongue stuck to a pole? — NO

50. Ever gone to school partially naked? — NO

51. Been a cheerleader? — NO

52. Sat on a roof top? — YES

53. Didn’t take a shower for a week? — NO

54. Too scared to watch scary movies alone? — NO

55. Played chicken? — NO

56. Been pushed into a pool/lake with all your clothes on? — NO

57. Been told you’re hot by a complete stranger? — YES

58. Been easily amused? — YES

59. Mooned/flashed someone? — YES

60. Cheated on a test? — NO

61. Forgotten someone’s name? — YES

62. Slept naked? — YES

63. Gone skinny dipping? — NO

64. Blacked out from drinking? — NO

65. Played a prank on someone? — YES

66. Gone to a late night movie? — YES

67. Looked at your reflection as you walked past a window? — YES

68. Failed a class? — YES

69. Choked on something you’re not supposed to eat? — NO

70. Played an instrument for more than 10 hours? — YES

71. Cheated on a girl/boyfriend? — NO

72. Thrown strange objects? — YES

73. Felt like killing someone? — YES

74. Felt like running away? — YES

75. Have you ever ran away? — NO

76. Made a parent cry? — YES

77. Cried over someone? — YES

78. Had sex more than 3 times in one day? — YES

79. Dated someone more than once? — YES

80. Had/Have a dog? — YES

81. Own an instrument? — YES

82. Been in a band/orchestra? — YES

83. Drank 25 sodas in a day? — YES

84. Broken a CD? — YES

85. Shot a gun? — NO

86. Had feelings for one of your best/good friends? — NO

Mush!

2008-10-15T11:00:00.003-04:00

Anyone else catch the premiere of "Iditarod: Toughest Race on Earth" last night? We happened across it while DH was flipping channels. What struck us right away was the fact that one of the mushers, Bruce Linton, is a type 1 PWD. Amazing! (Bruce is one tough hombre. He tested at 44 while getting ready to start and, instead of treating his low, he went on to feed his dogs first. Yikes!) Bruce hopes "just one kid...gets the message that they can...do anything."

I like Bruce's message of enthusiasm. How many times have we PWDs been told we couldn't do something, just because of the D? On the other hand, I watched my BG go from a perfect wake-up number today (99) to a mid-morning WTF level (313) for no apparent reason (no food, no coffee, but lots of stress...must've been the cortisol). So my take on his message is: yes, you can dream it, and you can even do it...but sometimes, you will also pay for it. Either that, or I'm a wuss ;-)

"Iditarod" continues on Discovery Channel this month. Check it out!

Go here...

2008-10-08T10:30:00.001-04:00

...and read this. Finally someone outside the OC is talking about it!

Me and Mr. B

2008-10-06T10:33:00.003-04:00

Lest the world wonder what side I'm on...that's pasty little me on the left with the shades, and Barack Obama on the right:

It was 2004 and Barack was running for Senate in Illinois. I was working for John Kerry, and we both nearly stepped in horse poop during a Mexican Independence Day parade :) Even then, he had an entourage...you just knew he wouldn't stay local too long.

What's your big Election Day issue, OC'ers? (Health care, anyone?!) Don't forget to vote Nov. 4th!

To Whom It May Concern.

2008-09-30T11:00:00.001-04:00

Dear Six Flags Great America,

As you can see from the photo, my husband and I visited your theme park this past Saturday. I've been to Great America numerous times in my life, starting when the park opened (in 1976 I was just a kid and it was called "Marriott's Great America"). I also happen to have type 1 diabetes, which I've successfully managed for over 25 years without complications. You might notice the black bag I'm carrying in the photo. This bag--a travel pack specifically made to strap securely to the body, much like a waist or "fanny" pack--holds my diabetes supplies. These include insulin, syringes, a blood glucose meter and glucose tablets for treating hypoglycemia. Being able to quickly test my blood sugar level and administer either glucose or insulin as needed is central to my self-care regimen. This bag is literally my lifeline, especially in a busy theme park like Great America. I must be able to access my supplies at any time; to lose this bag would be, quite frankly, life-threatening.

I had my bag on Logger's Run, as you can see in the photo. I also carried my bag onto the Demon (which I first rode as a child, when it was called the "Turn of the Century"), and encountered no incident despite the two upside-down loops the rollercoaster makes in its run. The Viper, with its 80-foot drop and maximum speeds of 50 MPH, also presented no challenge to my bag or its contents. However it is with great disappointment that I write to inform you of two other incidents that happened to me last weekend, both due to this bag.

My husband and I approached the American Eagle rollercoaster with great anticipation--this ride is one of our favorites--at about 3:30PM on Saturday, Sept. 28. We haven't been to the park for a year and were unaware of the fact that some rides, including the Eagle, now require "loose articles" to be left behind in lockers near ride boarding areas. A park employee stopped us and informed me of the rule. I explained my condition, and explained that my bag is a) not "loose", but strapped to my body and b) contains items that are medically necessary. The young lady replied that I must show medical identification in order to carry my bag onto the ride. I produced my MedicAlert bracelet, but she she stopped me again. She muttered something about "a manager has to approve this". However, instead of calling for management, she pointed to the lockers and told me I had to leave my bag behind if I wanted to go on the Eagle. I asked for her manager, but she had already walked away and ignored my calling after her. We were left to wonder at the inconsistency of her explanation without any offer of further assistance.

Because my husband and I wanted to preserve the previously happy atmosphere of the day, we declined to pursue the matter and, with great regret, chose not to ride the Eagle. After going on Logger's Run, we decided to go on the Whizzer, another old favorite, at about 4:30PM. We entered without incident and had already taken our seats on the rollercoaster when a park employee named Chris walked up to our car. He informed me that I had to remove my bag and leave it in an unlocked storage bin before being allowed to ride. When I again mentioned my need to carry the bag and identified my medical condition, Chris replied in a loud voice, "Well you're not going to have to shoot up on the ride, are you?" This comment was heard by everyone in the first half of the boarding area, and was made in a sarcastic tone that seriously offended me and my husband. I got out of my seat in disgust and left the ride. The park was closed to the public on Saturday to celebrate "Accenture Family Day", and my husband's work colleagues could very well have overheard Chris' remark and misinterpreted it. We left the park for good after this incident, our day having been effectively ruined by Chris' action. I shudder to think of how Chris would have spoken this way to a child with diabetes.

An unsecured bag storage area is a completely unacceptable solution for my diabetes supplies. As the ride has two separate trains, riders of the previous Whizzer train have unsupervised access when they return. My bag could have deliberately or accidentally been taken by one of these riders. Additionally, Chris' rude, ignorant remark made me wary of leaving my bag within his reach. Moreover, there was no signage prior to boarding the rollercoaster that indicated anything about "loose items"--which, again, my bag was not. A locker might seem like a solution, however insulin is highly susceptible to damage in hot weather and the lockers, while in shaded areas, have no ventilation or cooling system. Further, it turned me off to see another park guest encounter serious difficulty in getting her locker open after going on the "Dark Knight" ride; she waited over 30 minutes for a park employee to provide assistance, and though her locker was finally unlocked there was no explanation provided for the delay. If my insulin, money and source of glucose were to be locked away from me for 30 minutes, I would encounter significant trouble in regulating my blood glucose levels due to stress over the lack of access to my supplies. Therefore the locker solution, while admirable, leaves me unsatisfied.

I have no wish to reverse your policy on "loose items" on rides at Great America. I am sure there are valid legal and common-sense reasons for your restrictions (though I do find it absolutely incredible that an upside-down, multi-looping rollercoaster like the Demon has NO restriction on such items, whereas the Whizzer--a ride which is rated acceptable even for smaller children--has such a rule.) But the application and enforcement of your rules seems arbitrary and left up to the judgement of park employees, at least two of whom are clearly ill-equipped to deal with park guests who have disabilities. If a guest like me qualifies for special consideration under these rules, I expect park employees to be prompt and courteous in securing a manager if they have questions about that qualification. If a guest like me must indeed remove a bag before going on a ride, I expect the park employee handling the matter to treat me with respect, not make a callous, discriminatory remark that borders on slander.

For a couple or a family to truly enjoy Great America, there is little consolation in asking someone to stay off a ride for having a bag that is clearly a) NOT a toy, b) NOT a fashion accessory, or c) 100% essential to that person's health. What it does is make that person--me--feel left out and unwelcome. To me there is no longer anything "great" about Great America.

Diabetes: 1, Home: 0

2008-09-22T12:48:00.000-04:00

Oy. I'm struggling today. Last night's scorecard looks like this:

10:30PM: Go to bed with a BG of 178 and a snack (cereal--tricky, as we know...)

12:30AM: Wake up sweaty, shaking and ringing in at 34. Not good. Massive inhaling of carbs ensues. Take a correction dose of 2u Humalog to (hopefully) reverse the 'diabetic wolverine' effect.

4:30AM: Wake up, use the washroom. Test to see how the BG handled the crash earlier. 434...whoa. Take 3u and drink a few glasses of water, and try to go to sleep.

6:30AM: The cat decides to use my head as a pillow. I wake up and test: 212. Whew. I'm exhausted.

7:30AM: Out the door to work, still holding steady at 213. I take a half unit of Humalog, crack open a Diet Coke and prepare for the hour-long drive in to the office.

9:30AM: Back down to earth (relatively) at 183. Can I go home yet...?!?!

I Am Being Chased By an Angry Black Bear

2008-09-18T16:28:00.000-04:00

...in my dream, through a house I've never been in and with people I've never met. We go outside and I can see large paw prints in the dirt. The stranger with me wants to find the bear. I say, "Are you #^%(*^!!!** crazy? Let's get away!" But it's too late. The bear has seen us, and she's hungry. I feel a sense of dread as she approaches...

...and then I wake up. My blood sugar, which was 54 at 3:30AM, is now 303 as I get dressed for work. Weird.

Friday Night Videos: Commercial Mania!

2008-09-12T12:24:00.000-04:00

Oh God, those cheesy '80s commercials!

For shoes:

And kids (heavy on the Cabbage Patch Kids, of course):

And McD's (look for a future "Seinfeld" cast member):

And food (where's the whaa...?!)

And, ahem, unmentionables (for us girls!):

And, of course, those 'legendary' Levi's Button Fly 501 jeans:

Happy Friday!

In Memoriam

2008-09-11T12:30:00.000-04:00

Seven years on, we will never forget. (Dedicated to the memory of Marni Pont O'Doherty, Long Island, NY.)

Where Do You Go?

2008-09-08T11:46:00.000-04:00

...and what can you do, when you're 19 and a type 1--and don't have insurance?

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/chi-allkids-bridge-08-sep08,0,5689156.story

"Marquis Hart, 19, learned Feb. 1 that his All Kids coverage had ended. His mother, Linda Hart, a nursing assistant who is uninsured, has since been borrowing money from family and friends for her son's diabetes supplies: $90 a month for two types of insulin, $100 a month for a box of syringes for injections, and more for alcohol pads and strips for his glucose monitor. 'He's only taking his [blood] sugar [levels] when he feels funny because he [doesn't] have coverage anymore, and I don't have the money to pay for what he needs,' Hart said.

Hart is enrolling as a freshman at Daley College this month, but the school won't pay for his diabetes supplies and medications. Hart, who plans to major in computers and business, is anxious about what's going to happen to his health. 'It's a struggle to get the money to pay for what I need. I'd like to try to work, but no one's hiring," he said. "If only they could help me out until I find a way to better myself.'"

*Sigh* I was lucky at 19, my parents' health insurance still covered me. But I've been in the state program cited here and was close to being in Marquis' shoes as an adult. I went to bed with a knot in my stomach every night for a year, hoping I wouldn't lose my coverage. And all along I was made to feel having diabetes was somehow my fault or a character flaw, simply because I needed expensive medicines to stay alive.

How do you fix a broken system? How can we get both sides to agree on the problem?!

Sorry, rant over. Just reading about this upsets me...

Friday Night Videos

2008-09-05T13:05:00.000-04:00

Greetings to the OC, from whose friendly ranks I've been absent lately...L-I-F-E has gotten busy, namely work, but I'm still here (:-)

Here's a song from an '80s trio that makes me think of you all. Enjoy the weekend!

Friday Night Videos: Labor Day Edition

2008-08-29T11:51:00.000-04:00

A classic from the '80s, for everyone who might be taking off early from the office today ;-) Enjoy

Friday Night Videos

2008-08-22T11:00:00.000-04:00

The Smiths were better known as "the other guys playing instruments", since the band was really all about Morrissey...

"Every Day is Like Sunday"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IbJQ4YAPRo

"How Soon Is Now?"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K2NrIALcNOw

"Girlfriend in a Coma"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2tdF6ziim7E

Happy weeekend, everyone!

The Low Headache

2008-08-19T17:03:00.000-04:00

Hello to my dear friends of the OC {:-) I'm taking advantage of a slow workday to update my blog. The surf Nazi in my office is at a convention this week too. Hopefully I can sneak a few more posts in before he comes back {;-)

Ah, the low headache. You know that feeling--the dull, unfocused pain that radiates through the eyeballs, the wish for a nice dark room and a soft thing to sleep on, the ache that Tylenol and other pain relievers just can't touch? Yep, that one. And I'm working on a doozy as we speak (read? type? Ugh). I rang in at 55 ja few minutes ago and, although the BG is back on the rise, my lovely parting gift is here to stay. As much as my low symptoms change, the hangover hasn't varied much in 25 years. I guess it's just as well I was never a drinker, I'd trade anything for this lingering feeling of 'ugh'. How do you deal, OC friends?

In better news, I had a quick check-up this morning after a month of daily blood pressure monitoring; it appears my blood pressure issues of a few weeks back are indeed gone. My doctor also seemed very attentive and patient with me, a 180-degree change from my last few appointments. Guess it pays to be her first appointment of the day...I'll have to remember that from now on, even though I'm no morning person. And other work & life issues seem to be settling down as well.

But on one thing I must be blind, or lost, or just plain dense...why is everyone so crazy about this guy lately? I just don't get it...! Maybe it's because I'm a winter sports kinda gal?!?

Bumps.

2008-08-06T14:24:00.000-04:00

Mid-summer finds me in a funk. I'm going through some major stress at home & work right now, and as always diabetes manages to creep in and complicate things. A string of 300+ wake-up numbers in the past couple of weeks just makes it that much harder to bounce back. And like George said, the non-PWDs in the world just don't get it, no matter how much they may care or try to understand.

Sorry for the downer, OC friends. I'll be back on the blogs with a more positive attitude soon. I'll find my way back, I always do. I just wish sometimes I didn't have to worry about the D 24/7 along with all my other problems.

The results are in...

2008-07-21T17:02:00.000-04:00

...and my six-month A1C is (drum roll please): 6.1. Looks I'm out of the 5% club for now...}:-(

But at least everything else is in check, except my pesky HDL numbers (still abysmally low at 26). The BP front looks better too...might just be a case of white-coat syndrome. Or L-I-F-E...! Thanks for your input on how to handle my doctor, OC friends. I think I'll bring it up next time, as gently as possible. We'll see how it goes in 3 months' time {:-)

I'm sending out a shout to Kerri today--hope this sends a smile and a little cheer your way!

What To Do, O Blogosphere?

2008-07-18T12:00:00.000-04:00

I'm waiting for my A1C results today, after a whirlwind of six-month-follow-up appointments yesterday. (I also gave blood for a research study for the first time, which was exciting.) Though I'm pretty confident my level will be around the same as it was in January, I come to you conflicted, O Blogosphere, for I have lost confidence in someone very important: my primary care physician. What to do? Here's a little context:

The Good:

She's been my PCP since 1995
She was the one to urge me to switch to Lantus back in 2000
She's helped me get my A1Cs down from the high 7s to the mid- to high 5s
She's been very agressive about treating any cholesterol and cardiac-related issues, infections, cuts, low thyroid function, etc.
She's on staff at a major teaching hospital, which has long specialized in diabetes care

The Not-So-Good:

At my last three appointments (in the last 9 months or so) the office seemed more frantic and less organized than usual (forgetting my appointment, losing my chart, etc.)
At my last appointment (yesterday), she actually told me to "back off" my intensive management and cited the ACCORD study as evidence that "a lower A1C increases your risk of a heart attack." (and yes, D-world, I was shocked...I remember reading this thread among others, along with the ACCORD and ADVANCE studies, and coming to the conclusion that as a type 1, neither applied to me. I thought the American Association of Clinical Endocrinologists' guidelines were pretty clear on this too...)
She hasn't reviewed any of my medications in a year
I was the one to remind her of what tests needed to be done--yesterday I wouldn't have had a urinalysis or a foot inspection if I hadn't prompted her
There's something missing I can't put my finger on...lack of attention, maybe? Also at my last three appointments, she has seemed noticeably more distracted and less familiar with me & my history.

I'm befuddled, dear OC friends. As alarming as it is to hear a doctor tell me to let my A1Cs go up, contrary to all the evidence, she also wants me to see her in a month to follow up on some wonky blood pressure numbers. (Yes, I may need another pill...ugh.) So I can't fault her for lack of care there.

My husband recommends I think about it, then write her a letter or mention my concerns to her at that follow-up appoinment. In unrelated matters it is far more difficult for me to physically get to her office nowadays. I might be better off with a doctor in my own neck of the woods, or closer to my excellent eye and girl doctors. What do you think, dear OC? Should I bring it up, or just cut her a break and let it go?

Work Has Eaten Me Alive, and How Are You?

2008-07-11T00:08:00.000-04:00

My grandmother at age 22, circa 1936

Hope the rest of the OC has been faring well so far this summer. In the past month, my place of employment has a) reincorporated, b) moved to a new office, c) changed all its providers (though not health insurance...yet), and d) lost its computer network. Twice. Oh, and my commute doubled from 45 minutes to 90, and a workplace Surf Nazi has made it difficult for me to do anything online including blogging. Ugh.

But more on that later. Tonight I'm thinking about my grandmother, who would have been a whopping 94 years old this July. She's been gone 10 years now, but the heartache of life without her lingers. When I was little going to Gram's house was a magical time, filled with special foods only she gave us: orange sherbet, butter mints, graham crackers with butter and honey and, on special occasions, freezer cakes or fudge sundaes from the ice cream parlor down the street.

Diabetes changed all that, of course. She didn't understand it; when I left the hospital after being diagnosed she told me, "Be good and do what the doctors tell you, and you'll get better." Later she must have realized how much things had changed. But Gram always made me feel included, no matter what. The dinner table always had canned peaches or fruit cocktail for me (back in the days of "heavy syrup", she would carefully rinse everything and serve it in a crystal bowl. "Because you're special," she would say, and pat my shoulder.). I might not have been able to eat Oreos for dessert with my brother anymore, but she made sure I always had plain vanilla wafers and a banana. God love her, she often ruined perfectly good strawberries by dousing them in saccharin...but I smiled and thanked her and ate every last one. Every time.

We used to go shopping, Gram and I, when I first learned how to drive. I always got a kick out of looking at clothes together or talking about family things. She would crack me up by eating at McDonald's with me in the mall, with her high heels and perfectly done hair and makeup and designer clothes. ("They're the only ones who have fresh coffee," she would say. Hot black coffee was her drink of choice, be it 32 or 92 degrees outside.) She never asked me if I was low or high, because back then there was no way to tell. But when I got my own apartment she would tell my parents, "Don't worry, she'll be okay. She knows how to take care of herself."

We laid her to rest on a beautiful May morning. On her Mass card, we chose this verse:

“May the raindrops fall lightly on your brow.
May the soft winds freshen your spirit.
May the sunshine brighten your heart.
May the burdens of the day rest lightly upon you,
And may God enfold you in the mantle of His love.”

Goodnite, Gram. We still miss you.

Going Offline

2008-06-12T17:22:00.000-04:00

Taking a little break from the OC to tend to some offline business--namely work, which has gotten quite crazy in the last week or so. I'll be back soon!

What Happens Tomorrow?

2008-06-02T14:59:00.000-04:00

In honor of the low I rang in at after lunch today (56), I thought I'd list all the symptoms of hypoglycemia I've had over the years:

Mouth & tongue going numb
Mental confusion
Irrational thinking (I need juice, not glucose tabs...!)
Blind spots in both eyes (during Officially Scary lows)
Sudden onset of depression/sad thoughts
Shortness of breath
Chest pain
Shaking hands
Excessive chattiness (this one drives my DH nuts sometimes)

And, most recently, tingling in my limbs/extremities. Right now my left arm apparently enjoys favored nation status for this particular phenomenon...no idea why, it just starts when I'm going below 70 mg/dl. It's like my elbow is a tuning fork when I'm hovering in the 50s. Weird.

Like all things associated with the D, I'm sure this too shall pass. At least I can still tell when I'm low, for the most part. How about you all out there in OC-land?

Friday Night Videos

2008-05-30T11:24:00.000-04:00

You had to love Kool and the Gang. Whether at someone's party or at a school dance, you were sure to hear at least one of their songs back in the '80s. Of course "Celebration" is still a popular pick, but I also liked less frequently played hits--like this one from 1983, "Tonight":

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F3sm3--EnfM

As Tubbs from "Miami Vice" would say..."Solid!" {:-) Have a great weekend, everyone!

Road Trip

2008-05-28T12:26:00.000-04:00

This past weekend my husband and I attended a family reunion in Kentucky. We decided to drive from Chicago due to the sky-high airfares, which meant 6+ hours on the highway each way. Our annual trip always includes a visit to Natural Bridge State Park, which soothes the senses after a long day of traveling. Take a peek here: http://parks.ky.gov/findparks/resortparks/nb/gallery/.

Managing diabetes on the road can be tricky, even under the best of circumstances (such as a non-PWD to take turns driving, which my DH did quite often). For me it helps to keep a nonstop supply of fluids going in, which means more frequent bathroom breaks. I also need to eat on a more regular schedule than usual. Apart from other standard precautions (juice on hand, testing before driving and also during the trip), these two things go a long way toward staving off unwelcome highs and lows.

A couple of times, however, the D reared its ugly head at inopportune moments. I dropped to 57 while navigating through crazy Indianapolis traffic, and during a tense morning I went from 124 to 370 in the space of an hour after misjudging my carbs at breakfast. I wasn't myself at either time, and I'm not proud of it (note to self, don't discuss sensitive issues with DH while high or low). It just seems that the normal pains of travel take a little more out of me than the average bear. Sometimes it's hard to get that across to the non-PWD population...

For now it's back to work and the routine. Ugh :( Hope everyone out in the OC had a good holiday!

Friday Night Videos: Memorial Day Edition

2008-05-23T11:00:00.000-04:00

This week's selection is dedicated to three special veterans:

My father (U.S. Army, Vietnam, 1964-66);
My brother (U.S. Air Force, Gulf War I/Kosovo campaign, 1991-1994);

and my husband (U.S. Army, Cold War, 1982-1986)

To them, and to all veterans, you have my humble thanks. May we Americans continue to honor your oath: to "support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic." Happy Memorial Day weekend, everyone!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yPudiBR15mk

Say Hello to My (New) Little Friend

2008-05-21T12:29:00.000-04:00

Due to a Vista upgrade on my home computer, I found myself needing a boost in the meter department as well. My old piece o'crap cheapie model was reliable but slow, and data was difficult to upload. Using Vista also meant losing the ability to log in to the Web-based data management software for the thing, which of course only works on XP/Internet Explorer 6. So thanks to an online freebie offer, I now use the OneTouch Ultra II. So far I'm liking it -- amazing how going from a 10 to 5 second wait for results makes life that much easier :-) And the data uploading capability, so far, is a gem. (Yay! If I had to manually enter all my results I'd go mad.)

I'm no fan of the black zippy case that came with it, however. I always carry my insulin bottles and syringes with my meter, and there was nowhere to put them. So I'm working on a solution...my choice right now is a $5 bag I got at Walgreens:

I've looked at some of the nicer meter cases online, but nothing fits my tastes (or budget) right now. I'm also trying desperately to avoid carrying a yet-larger purse to hold all my stuff. Ah, the joys of being a girl with diabetes :-) But, more importantly, we'll see if the OneTouch helps keep me in the 5% club come July, when I have my next A1C done.

Now, about those Mac commercials...really, Apple, aren't you over this by now...?!?

I Get Weeeird...

2008-05-19T12:40:00.000-04:00

I've been tagged by Cara in the latest meme-o-thon. So here come my 10 little oddities!

10) I cannot stand being followed too closely while walking down the street. I'll actually stop and pretend to get a text message or something, just to let the other person go by.

9) Though I'd like to think I'm not secretly OCD ;-), I do rearrange the money in my wallet so that all the bills are in order by denomination--makes it easier to zip through the check-put line. Sometimes I even make sure they're facing the same way. Then I count my change and make sure I have certain combinations (six quarters, five dimes, etc.)...Aaaaaaahhh...!

8) In high school I played alto saxphone, as previously posted. Since then I've probably only played a few times. I used to dream of performing on stage in a band, but alas...

7) I'm distantly related to a former President, Warren G. Harding, on my mother's side of the family. As my fellow Americans may recall from elementary school, he was considered by many to be one of the "worst" U.S. commanders in chief. Not sure how he stacks up nowadays...!

6) I learned beginner-level American Sign Language for an old job. To this day I can still carry on a very basic conversation.

5) Speaking of hearing, I'm also completely deaf in my left ear due to congenital nerve deafness. I've never worn a hearing aid, although my husband sometimes swears I need one!

4) Some of the places I really want to see someday are California, London, Moscow, Germany, Australia, Chile and Tokyo. I would especially love to go on a literary tour of London and/or England. So far I've been to Ireland, Scotland, Wales, western England, Canada, and the Bahamas.

3) And speaking of Oz, my birthday happens to fall on Australian Independence Day (Jan. 26). I'd love to celebrate it Down Under someday, watching the fireworks in a summer sky :-)

2) I have a "Rain Man"-like ability to remember numbers, especially phone numbers. I can't usually remember then the first time I hear or read them, but once they're burned into my brain they're permanent. (I still remember my best friend's phone number from childhood!)

1) And finally, I'm grateful for the memories of growing up in the house my great-grandfather built in 1911, where my grandfather and my father also grew up. Three generations of my family also attended the same two grade schools in my old neighborhood. In a big city like Chicago, this is rare indeed.

If you've read this far and haven't participated, consider yourself tagged!

Friday Night Videos

2008-05-16T14:10:00.000-04:00

I loved INXS. Poor Michael. Enjoy and remember a great band!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=by6uESG9TGg

Gratuitous Cat Post

2008-05-14T16:11:00.000-04:00

Behold El Magnifico {:-) We've had him (or is it the reverse?!) for two years now. He's always been a morning cat, but I've noticed he gets especially agitated if I have a classic 3AM low. Anyone else have a furball who can tell your blood sugar level, as if by magic?

Poor kitty, he isn't feeling well today. Get well soon, my little beast...(If you like, check out his blog at http://vivaelmagnifico.blogspot.com/)